December 29, 2006
December 27, 2006
I'm in airport hell
awake 25 hours
safety first I guess
Exhaustion sets in
filling out holiday cards
trying to stay zen
scarier by the minute
going home is jinxed
oh airport musak
holiday tunes like torture
December 26, 2006
December 22, 2006
December 08, 2006
December 07, 2006
December 06, 2006
November 20, 2006
November 14, 2006
-Use more kind words (less catty comments)
-Be compassionate of people's actions and decisions (less judgmental)
-Work every day towards pursuing voice-over
-Dedicate more time to writing my novel
-Live for a period of time in another country
-Purge my apartment of all unnecessary items
Thank you so much for all of your support and suggestions already so far! Check out pix of the coast.
November 12, 2006
53 years old.University researcher. Scientific network in environmental-social issues, biodiversity, wildlife photographer. English, Spanish. I live alone. I can host 1/2 person.
Goodness, which half will I ever choose???
November 11, 2006
October 26, 2006
Today a co-worker found this little bit to add to it: If life hands you lemons, you should make lemonade...and then try to find someone whose life has handed them vodka.
And this is so true for me. I am always trying to find the lessons in life's challanges, to show gratitude for what I have instead of disappointment for what I didn't get, but damn it, this week I'm gettin' drunk!!
October 24, 2006
For example: Today in the office I heard someone "pssst" at me. I turned around but nobody was there. I heard it again, "pssst". I stood on my tiptoes and peeked over the cubicle wall and again, not a soul. Naturally I assumed the dementia was setting in and continued my work, noting when I heard the "pssst", but not wasting any more energy looking for the source. It wasn't until about an hour before I was leaving the office that I realized it was my left wrist with its bands of bangles grazing my desktop that was causing the sound. Cuckoo!
October 23, 2006
Snakes in Amy's mouth!
Brett arrives for back-up
I lamost got kicked out for taking this shot
San Franciscans love an excuse to dress up
I found this costume the very next day!
October 17, 2006
Sound important and create your own bullshit here.
Here is a list of perks I'll enjoy, as well as a few indulging spa treatments!
*Self-guided VIP tour of the local Pacific Star Winery, perched on one of the most spectacular ocean bluffs in the world.
*2 nights in a luxury suite with wood-burning fireplace, scenic vistas, fully stocked honor bar, Temper-Pedic sleep system, and much more!
*Soak in a private hot tub nestled along the canyon rim, while watching the sunset over the Pacific Ocean, with complimentary Navarro Chardonnay chilled on ice waiting for you there.
*Wake each morning to a gourmet lavish breakfast served in our award winning dining room.
*Complimentary Wireless Internet throughout resort
*Cable TV with HBO
*Long-Range Cordless Phone & 2-Line Desk Speakerphone
*Free Laptop for use during stay
*Free Digital Camera for use during stay
*Premium Spa Amenities by Hermes, Paris.
*Plush Chenille Logo Spa Robes for use during stay
October 12, 2006
October 11, 2006
October 06, 2006
October 02, 2006
September 17, 2006
September 09, 2006
September 06, 2006
Particular color combinations evoke an adverse physical reaction within me
I am allergic to my own sweat
When I chew gum, I separate it into two pieces and chew one on each side
I grew four inches in just over a year right after high school
I have two brothers named David
I suffer from coulrophobia
I am obsessed with things that glow
The very first night my friend's parents took us out to dinner. Everyone was understandably worried whether or not I would enjoy Japanese cuisine. I mentioned that I like sushi, and before I knew it, one of the cute little silver fish in the tank next to us was on our table sashimi style. The head was on the plate. His mouth was still opening and closing. The tail kept moving.
Japanese television is hysterical. Sumo wrestling matches, home shopping channels, soap operas and lots of variety shows. You'll turn on what you think is a game show, and the next minute they’re reviewing food; and before it's all over you'll see a musical number, pet tricks, and an infomercial for this. Most of the commercials are for beer, green tea or mobile phones, and contain an adorable animated animal. My favorite is an ad for...hell I don't know, where these three little koalas come out and do a groovy ass-shakin' dance, and proceed to remove their noses which they then use at mobile phones. I finally just got the link to them and I found out the commerical is for car insurance.
Here’s a snippet of funny tv. Late night tv provides the Japanese with a show on learning English. One night we found the show taking place in an office setting teaching the phrases, “I’m fed up”. And “Do it yourself”. Leave it to us to kill the sweet obliging nature of the far East.
When you enter stores and restaurants in Japan you’re greeted by employees calling out, “Irrasshaimase” (pronounce Irra-sha-ma-say). It can also be used when trying to lure people into establishments. To hear what it sounds like when you’re in a mall and within earshot of about eight different shops shouting the greeting, who are also blasting varying hyper-techno music, click here.
Customer Service in Japan is heavenly. We were in the train station one day and accidentally purchased tickets when we already had a Japan Rail Pass. We asked a ticket taker if there was anything we could do, and she suggested pressing the call button on the ticket machine; she said someone would be over to help us. So we pressed the button and kept an eye out for someone who would be walking over to help us, when a woman popped out of a panel in the wall surrounding the ticket machine. “Nobody sees the wizard! Not nobody not no how”! In less than a minute we had cash back for our blunder. Later when we were on the train and I was using the toilet, I saw a call button next to the sink. I cracked myself up imagining where the toilet service rep might pop out of! And speaking of toilets…
Japanese bathrooms were an experience all their own. The first unique feature I found was a button and speaker on the stall wall, similar to an intercom, and when the button is pushed it emits the sound of running water so others can’t hear…well, so all others can hear is running water. Other facilities were much more elaborate. An arm rest attached to the toilet with options of sound, scent, and varying degrees of bidet. The one time I was adventurous enough to meddle with the bidet feature was a scene out of The Three Stooges. The instant the stream made contact, it tickled so badly that I leapt off the bowl and water saturated my pants, splashed against the stall door and left a telling puddle on the floor.
We went out one night to a Tokyo fashion/fetish show. We certainly didn’t see anything that would shock anyone who’s been living in San Francisco for seven years, but it was interesting seeing the Japanese take on it. Everything was very cutesy. The outfits, the décor, and even when two girls dripped hot wax on each other on stage, the one on the receiving end was nodding and giggling rather than moaning or acting erotic. The scene was a great mix of jovial Europeans and Japanese, and the music kept me wiggling. Several Japanese men wanted their picture taken with me (being a round eye and all) and one gentleman told me, “Japan and America best friends. I want American wife. You are very beautiful”. If only American men were so direct.
We stumbled upon the most adorable café in the world, (okay the cutest I’ve seen on four continents) in Harajuku. It’s in the basement of an unassuming office building, sharing the floor with a dingy Chinese restaurant. It’s very tiny, seating about 12-15, warmly lit, with shelves floor to ceiling filled with children’s books. The tableware was vintage American so it was more than peculiar to be 10,000 miles away from home, in a subterranean Japanese café, only to be drinking tea from a U.S. Navy issued mug that I had used as a child that my dad swiped off his submarine.
We rode the Shinkansen down the coast to Kyoto and Hiroshima. One night we stayed a night at a hot springs resort in Izu that was surreal. Waterfalls, 28 natural hot springs (two in caves) and a warm lap pool, all set in the lush green forest next to a creek. On the night of a famous festival we took a night time stroll to a waterfall guided by paper lanterns. It was haunting and romantic in the most beautiful way.
I had one of the most fascinating conversations I’ve ever had in my life with my friend’s mother regarding Japanese sounds. Animal sounds, weather sounds, motion sounds and for the Japanese, even adjective sounds. Since I live to communicate I found it revelatory! Here are a few examples:
pig : bu-bu (boo-boo)
dog : wan wan ( one one )
something slippery : tsuru tsuru(tsulu tsulu)
something sparkly : kila kila
rain ( hard) : zaa zaa
rain ( little ) : shito shito
sunny : san san
wind ( strong ) : byu byu ( view view )
wind ( weak ) : soyo soyo
Here are some of my favorite general words/phrases I learned while I was there:
onaka suita-i'm hungry
onaka nemui-i'm tired
kowaii-scary (very distinct pronunciation from kawaii, and makes people giggle when you use the wrong one when trying to compliment a newborn baby)
ne-added to the end of a word for emphasis like when it's 100 degrees you say "atsui ne" which is roughly "It's hot as hell right"?
watashi mo-me too
diskii-i really like it
chotto baka-a little stupid
daego bu-i'm okay
The Japanese culture as a whole is orderly, polite, creative and comical. I find most people to be friendly when I travel, and the Japanese add pride, integrity and humor that I felt really close to. And of course, my friend’s family and friends: her parents were thoughtful and nurturing, and her sister, a new mother to precious a baby boy, was a delight. Her friends were comfortable and very entertaining. I’m hoping to venture to Nihon again in the fall to experience the colors, smells and tastes of another season there. Thank you again Ayano and Chris for your generosity and making this amazing experience possible.
August 31, 2006
You know you're important when your sister gets hit by a car, has a root canal, goes to work, gabs all night with old friends, then puts you on hold to try to get a piece of ass! Wait, there was a point there somewhere.
New shoes and ice cream and yard sales and cocktails
Long baths and handbags and good times with gal pals
Men who will bow as I walk down the street
These are a few of my favorite things.
When my job sucks
When my date's late
When I break a nail
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel insane.
August 29, 2006
August 17, 2006
August 16, 2006
Did I ever mention I dated a Mofia head?
I didn't have the quintessential horror of a prom dress. However it WAS horrifying when my date's ex of four years arrived in the same dress.
I got at least 4 inches with this baby.
August 12, 2006
August 11, 2006
August 10, 2006
I observed a man in his late thirties, appeared to be Latin, wearing brown slacks, a striped button down shirt and sunglasses. He slightly resembled Johnny Depp. He had a goatee that was split in two and braided with two white beads on the ends.
I could use this look on stage when trying to portray a dressed down Jack Sparrow.
August 04, 2006
A fifty-something man with long gray hair tied back in a ponytail reaches around, grabs his ponytail, puts the bottom three or four inches in his mouth, and munches on it with his lips covering his teeth. For a very long time.
I could use these characteristics on stage when playing someone with no couth.
August 03, 2006
July 20, 2006
June 18, 2006
A-list kiddie parties. This is how I roll, y'all.
June 16, 2006
May 24, 2006
Reese [who hails from the quintessential white-trash upbringing and a background in video stores and surf shops] fled from Virginia to California in 1998 where she rocked the commercial real estate world [and tolerated the belligerence and chauvinism of the middle-aged white man] as a Revenue Coordinator for Grubb and Ellis until 2002. She then applied her outstanding project management skills to the Interior Designer circuit for two years [catering to the whims of spoiled coke addicts] as an Office Manager/Expeditor. She came to us almost two years ago after spending six months traveling to Hawaii and throughout Europe [blowing a small inheritance while chasing a man around the globe].
May 23, 2006
Pix here. Unfortunately none of the penis.
May 19, 2006
When your neck is feeling flaky scratch it off. When your neck is seeming sticky wipe it off. When your collar's looking oozy and you're feeling like a floozy, when your clavicle is pasty he got off!
Well my relationship with Banana Man may not have progressed but my cubicle decor, aka The Banana Shrine, has taken on a life all its own. It all started with exhibit A. After Banana Man visited our office, I pinned the message that was wrapped around the banana he gave me as a memento of his cuteness. Plus I was the one who requested the cheesy message and it made me laugh. Next up exhibit B. One of my co-workers drew a cute little sketch from a comment her boyfriend made in the car one day; "The banana eater in the RAV4 heads to the West". It was random yet related, and I LOVED it. Exhibit C is the Fruitguys newsletter that came in our fruit basket the day before the big date. Every week the owner spotlights a different fruit and this one was coincidentally all about bananas. D was a standard thank you card given to me with one little embellishment added for my benefit. It looked right at home next to the sketch. I found exhibit E two days after our date, stuck to a dvd that a friend returned. The pink side is supposed to depict me meditating, with a caption that reads, "I heart big bananas"! The blue side is obviously the giant walking fruit exclaiming, "I found the woman of my dreams"! Exhibit F came from a friend, long after all hope of a second date was gone, but was applicable nonetheless. It's an excerpt from a box of hair color instructions stating, "If your highlighted/lightened hair is: Pale Yellow (like the inside of a banana) or Yellow (like the outside of a banana)...I've been coloring my hair for 18 years and I have never seen a manufacturer acknowledging the association between blond hair color and bananas before; it had to be included. And the latest addition, exhibit G, came after a visit to Starbucks with a friend, when I was feeling slightly dejected over being blown off by a man who wears a banana suit, and the new Summer display was all about the new Banana Frappuccino. I grumbled and pointed at the chalkboard indicating my annoyance AND interest in taking a picture of it, when I looked over and saw a pad of 'Take One' flyers that would work just as well.
How long can we keep this going?!
May 12, 2006
The date was great. And if I don't hear from him, at the very least I finally had my first pleasant dating experience in about 10 months!
April 28, 2006
April 13, 2006
My favorite was "Reese looks like a cross between a cartoon duckling and a revolutionary Bolshevik". But here were a few other ticklers:
"Reese looks like she has bad breath".
"Reese looks like a pimp".
"Reese looks like a normal person, not a silly Barbie".
"Reese looks like she wants to devour Jack".
"Reese looks like your average 7th grader".
April 04, 2006
March 24, 2006
March 23, 2006
Drinking style: Impulsive Aries people like to party and sometimes don't know when to call it a night. Their competitive streak makes them prone to closing-time shot contests. They're sloppy, fun drunks, and they get mighty flirty after a couple tipples. Getting Aries people drunk is a good way to get what you want out of them, should other methods fail. Aries can become bellicose when blotto, but they will assume that whatever happened should be forgiven (if not forgotten) by sunrise. They can be counted on to do the same for you -- so long as you haven't gone and done anything really horrible to them last night, you sneaky Gemini.
Drinking style: Taurus prefers to drink at a leisurely pace, aiming for a mellow glow rather than a full-on zonk. Since a truly intoxicated Taurus is a one-person stampede, the kind of bull-in-a-china-shop inebriate who spills red wine on white carpets and tells fart jokes to employers, the preference for wining and dining (or Bud and buddies) to body shots and barfing is quite fortunate for the rest of us. This is not to say that the Bull is by any means a teetotaler -- god, no. A squiffy Taurus will get, er, gregarious (full of loudmouth soup, some would say) and is extremely amusing to drag to a karaoke bar when intoxicated.
Drinking style: Gemini's can drink without changing their behavior much-- they're so naturally chatty and short-attention-spanned that it's just hard to tell sometimes. They can amaze you by conversing with finesse and allusion, then doing something unbelievable in an extremely advanced state of intoxication, like puking in your shoe. Gemini's possess the magic ability to flirt successfully (and uninfuriatingly, which is very tricky) with several people at once. They like to order different cocktails every round -- repetition is boring -- and may create a theme (like yellow drinks: beer, sauvignon blanc and limoncello) for their own amusement.
Drinking style: Cancer is a comfort drinker -- and an extra wine with dinner or an after-work beer or six can be extra comforting, can't it, Cancer darling? Like fellow water signs Scorpio and Pisces, Crabs must guard against lushery. Cancers are brilliant at ferreting out secret parties and insinuating themselves on VIP lists -- and, in true Hollywood style, Cancers are never really drunk; instead, they get "tired and emotional" (read: weepy when lubricated). But there's nothing better than swapping stories (and spit) over a few bottles of inky red wine with your favorite Cancer. Even your second-favorite Cancer will do. The sign also rules the flavor vanilla, and you'd be adored if you served up a vanilla vodka and soda.
Drinking style: Leo likes to drink and dance -- they're often fabulous dancers, and usually pretty good drinkers as well, losing their commanding dignity and turning kittenish. Of course, they're quite aware they're darling - Leos will be Leos, after all. They generally know their limit, probably because they loathe losing self-control. When they get over-refreshed, expect flirting to ensue -- and perhaps not with the one who brought them. But Leo's not the type to break rules even when drunk, so just try to ignore it (try harder, Cancer) and expect a sheepish (and hung over) Lion to make it up to you the next day.
Drinking style: Cerebral Virgos are compelled to impose order onto their bender. Their famously fussy quest for purity could lead to drinking less than other signs, sure -- but it could also lead to drinking booze neat, to sucking down organic wine or just to brand loyalty. They rarely get fully shellacked -- but, oh, when they do! Virgo's controlled by the intellect, but there's an unbridled beast lurking within, and they let it loose when walloped. It's dead sexy (and surprisingly unsloppy). As one Virgo friend used to declare, "I'm going to drink myself into a low level of intelligence tonight." A toast to the subgenius IQ!
Drinking style: "I'm just a social drinker," slurs Libra, "it's just that I'm so damn social." Libra loves nothing more than to party, mingle and relate to everyone. Whether dipped in favor of Good Libra (with Insta-Friend device set to "on") or heavier on the Evil Libra side (they are little instigators when bored), the Scales can really work a room. Charming as they are, Libras are notoriously lacking in self-control, however, which can get them into all sorts of trouble -- including wearing their wobbly boots waaaay too early in the evening, flirting with their best friend's beau or even blacking out the night's events entirely.Oops!
Drinking style: Don't ever tell Scorpios they've had enough, for they'll smirk at you and quietly but intentionally keep tippling till they're hog-whimpering drunk, out of 100-proof spite. Scorpios like to drink, and screw you if you have a problem with that. Most of them see the sauce as something to savor in itself, and not as a personality-altering tool - though if depressed, self-loathing Scorps seek total obliteration. But generally, they're fascinating drinking pals, brilliant conversationalists and dizzying flirts.They also remember everything -- especially what you did when you were blitzed. Only drink with a Scorpio who likes you.
Drinking style: In vino veritas -- and, for Sagittarius, in booze blurtiness: When buttered, they'll spill all your secrets and many of their own. Tactlessness aside, Sagittarius is just plain fun to drink with. This is a sign of serious partying (what else would you expect from the sign of Sinatra, Keith Richards, the Bush twins and Anna Nicole Smith?). They're the people who chat up everyone in the room, then persuade the entire crowd to travel somewhere else -- like a nightclub, or a playground, or Cancun. Good-natured hi-jinks are sure to ensue (including a high possibility of loopy groping; spontaneous Sag is a brilliant booty call).
Drinking style: Capricorn is usually described as practical,steadfast, money-hungry and status-thirsty -- no wonder they get left off the astrological cocktail-party list. But this is the sign of David Bowie and Annie Lennox, not to mention Elvis. Capricorn is the true rock star: independent, powerful and seriously charismatic, not too eager to please. And if they make money being themselves, who are you to quibble? But just like most rock stars, they're either totally on or totally off, and they generally need a little social lubricant to loosen up and enjoy the after party, especially if they can hook up with a cute groupie.
Drinking style: Aquarius and drinking don't go together that well (except for water, that is). They have an innate tendency toward know-it-allism, and if they get an idea while sizzled, they're more stubborn than a stain or a stone. If they're throwing a party or organizing an outing, however, they're too preoccupied with their duties to get combative and they make perfectly charming drunks in that case. Fortunately, they're usually capital drink-nursers. They also make the best designated drivers (if you can get them before they start raising their wrist) Aquarius is fascinated by drunk people and capable of holding interesting conversations with soused strangers while sober.
Drinking style: If you're a Pisces, you've probably already heard that you share a sign and an addictive personality -- with Liz Taylor, Liza Minelli and Kurt Cobain. Not only do Pisces like to lose themselves in the dreamy, out-there feeling that only hooch can give, but they build up a mighty tolerance fast. Who needs an expensive date like that? On the other hand, they're fabulously enchanting partners, whether in conversation or in crime. With the right Pisces, you can start out sharing a pitcher of margaritas and wind up in bed together for days. The phrase "addictive personality" can be read two ways you know.
March 22, 2006
March 21, 2006
March 20, 2006
March 17, 2006
March 13, 2006
February 26, 2006
February 07, 2006
learn he was just a guy sitting by the door (Luckily he was honest)
9) The guy in the vinyl goth jacket and eyeliner. Hello? Yes it's
1982, they want their look back
8) The aspiring exotic dancer practicing against the mirrored walls
7) Emily's crawlin' on the floor dance moves (and rallying after being
in her jammies)
6) Colleen's sage wisdom on virtue in the cab
5) Richard's ability to continue to take photos after 6 hours of drinking
4) Ali's colorful parade of dancing partners
3) Having a girl who is out with her boyfriend tell me I that can be
her Lipstick Girl for the night
2) After talking for two minutes, a gay guy telling Robin that he went
down on a girl for the first time recently and "It tasted like
1) Getting asked out by a tranny