A Day in the Park

It's pure punishment that I was volunteered by my boss to entertain/baby sit the kids who are going to be in our office this afternoon for the "Bring your kids to work day" the day after a big company event that involved scotch and beer. "Pipe down kid, your Auntie Reese is hung. Now be a good little girl and go fetch me a pack of menthols and some Tums. What do I look like an adult? Just because I'm taller than you doesn't mean I'm more Reeseponsible, now move, I gotta go find a toilet"! (this was part of an email exchange I had with a friend today when discussing my pain)

I took four boys to a park in the middle of downtown San Francisco at one in the afternoon. Age six five, and two that are 3 and a half. It didn't hit me until we got to the park that they only knew me as Bouncy Girl (a nickname one of their Moms, my boss's boss, gave me). I didn't bother correcting them; the less they know the better. They were pretty unruly and my baby fever has officially recessed into the negative.

Sono Italiano

Ever since I met my biological father just over a year ago and learned that I may be part Italian and Native American, I've been trying to get some relative's names to do research. I'd love to have an Italian passport youknowwhatI'msaying. Well it hasn't been easy. Tom (bio-dad) has had major computer issues so he doesn't get to email as much as he wants, and he's had the wrong phone number for me for the past four months. And apparently the person in the family who would have the information is getting old and her memory isn't so good. I figured I'd have to go to courthouses in Illinois and start with Tom's name and work my way back, but yesterday when I got home from work, there was an email from Tom with names! So one of my Great-Grandmothers was Natalia Bonn from Austria, and my Great-Grandfather was Antonio Turra! Tom said his Aunt who gave him the names might even have an original copy of their marriage license! That makes it so much easier to locate birth certificates. This is a fantastic lead, but I do have another obstacle. I have to look into proving Tom as my father since he's not on my birth certificate. Ah well, good thing I love investigating.

Kids really do say the darndest things...

I was sitting in the back seat with my friend's sons Jazzmo (6) and Shoogie (2) when Jazzmo started a play on words that eventually made it's way to BOOBY. He bgan staring at my chest and as he had his finger up his nose he queried "You don't even got boobies do you"?

An A for Effort

Saturday night at a charity party at the DNA Lounge, with the worst music EVER, Abby and I gave a valiant effort to dance and mingle anyway. I spotted a guy who I had flirted with at the Jell-O wrestling party a while back. I wasn't terribly attracted to his face, but his body was amazing however, Eloise just told me was only 23, and watching him dance on stage like it was MTV's Spring Break, I was getting the impression he certainly acted his age.

So at one point he's standing next to me and he starts talking to me and I remind him that we've already met and he starts to fill in the blanks. "Oh yeah, but you wore your cowboy hat all night, you changed your hair, or I guess your hair was like this just under the hat. You're lucky I like short hair". Oh well thank GOD! I was beginning to think I was going to die an old maid because I decided to strip myself of my 'femininity'. I AM lucky you came along! Jockstrap.

All in all I had fun laughing and chatting with Abby and Eloise and a couple of guy pals of hers. I'm glad Abby wouldn't let me stay in my comfortable shell on the sidelines. Who in the world would have thought I could be a wallflower, but the longer I go without a date the more removed I feel. I'm going through a little bitter phase at the moment. But thanks to Abby I did have two great revelations last night: one is that I may not be flirting as much as I used to, but it's because I don't have the need for men to show interest if I'm not interested. And two, I need someone who is my social equal. Not class, but outgoingness. My last boyfriend was very sweet and funny in private, but I love men who are sociable and playful in public.

Regina's Top Five from the Orkut Party:

5) My two self-insights

4) Making Abby laugh hysterically in the bathroom because I knew all the words to Freaks of the Industry by Digital Underground

3) Being "Lucky" enough to run into "Mick" again

2) Talking my way into the club b/c we weren't on the list

1) Witnessing Abby's brief lesbianesque interlude on the dancefloor

Bonus: The gay, gay, gay, gay, gay, gay, GAY paid dancers

It's a Boy!

Hell it could be a girl, I don't know. Manu's four little eggs hatched but right now they're just tiny fuzzy blobs with the occasional beak poking out. Once they take shape I'll post photos.

Wednesday I learned that my sister in-law and niece are attending a wedding in Napa on the 30th of this month, and so they’re staying with me until the 2nd! I'm thrilled to play host to my new-found family, but does anyone know how badly timed this is? The new season of The Family Guy premiers Sunday night at 9pm. "Yeaaaaaah, I know you came all the way out here from Illinois and all, but I have to go watch cartoons with my friends". And I can't really invite them along. There are acts involved in The Family Guy ritual that severely Christian Midwest in-laws just don't need to be a part of. EVER! And then there's the show itself! Despite my personal view, I doubt others would be so amused if my very well behaved six year-old niece went back to little old Collinsville exclaiming, "Damn it to the bloody bowels of hell"! after a visit with Auntie Reese.

Hubba Hubba

This is going to seem entirely too SATC even for me, but....

Think back to the greatest lover you've ever had. Not like "Oh honey, making love makes me feel closer to you", but wild, raw, adventurous, no inhibitions, role playing, bed breaking, S&M, doing it in public places, what was your name again fuckfests!

Every person that I've spoken to about this, single or in a relationship, male or female have all said that the best lovers they've ever had were no more than that; just sex. Not an S.O., not even their spouses. Can we only allow ourselves to be freaks in the bedroom when there's no commitment? Or are there certain gifted people who are just mind-blowing lovers whether they're available or spoken for and so now our rockin' ex-lover's husbands and wives are enjoying an eternity of thrills, chills, squeals and rug-burn?

My latest and greatest fav cut-down: asshat

Nature Up Close

Originally uploaded by qr.

Manu has laid an egg every morning this week except for today. I've been afraid that the high winds would blow the window open and then she'd lose her little babies-to-be, but the nook seems to be fairly protected.

I spy with my little eye.....

The Birds and the Bees

Originally uploaded by qr.

I'm so excited! I'm going to play host to another nest of baby birds this year. Last year I noticed a couple of twigs in the space that my open bathroom window creates before I left for Kauai in April, and when I came back a week later, there was a full-on nest with five tiny pale blue eggs. Two weeks after that they hatched and I got to watch them grow from itty-bitty weak-necked featherless things to strong, loud little boogers. I even got to see two of them take their first flight leaving the nest! I woke this morning to Manu (Hawaiian for bird) chirping much louder than usual. When I went into the bathroom she didn't budge from the nest which she's never done before; she always flutters away immediately. I had a feeling she may be laying an egg, and finally an hour later she flew away exposing a cute little blue speckled egg. I'm looking forward to seeing how many she lays this time and how often. I'll keep posting pix of her progress.

Big Congrats to Bri in Phoenix on her new job. She just gave notice three weeks after her company offered her a promotion, (after they considered offering it to someone her jr. that SHE trained, and had the effrontery to tell her so), denied her salary request, revoked the offer all together insisting it had nothing to do with asking for more money (and not a whole lot of it I might add), and THEN offered to match what she'll be making at her new job to persuade her to stay (which is coincidentally exactly what she has requested when the promotion was offered to her)! Damn, those suckers don't know what they lettin' go!

Would anyone think less of me if I applied to be a model?

Golly Jeepers!

I wasn't even stoned...

and I laughed so hard at this, I peed just a little bit.

Can You Come Out and Play?!

Originally uploaded by qr.

Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad

Ain't no joke....

I have a wisdom tooth coming in and it hurts like a motherfucker.

Peaches-Fatherfucker

Pick it up now or you are a lame-ass

It's always a good idea to check the back side of your recycled scratch paper that you scribble a note on and give to a co-worker