May 30, 2002


A couple of weeks ago I noted 3 all too coincidental instances in one day. I observed 3 more just yesterday. I'm a magnet for the freaky I tell ya!

First day
1) Before I left the house that morning I was playing a Cure cd and the last song I heard was "Hot Hot Hot". I left the house on my way to brunch at the BitterRoot with friends, which isn't part of the oddity but is so worth mentioning, the eggs gravlox is stellar!, and I ran into 2 neighbors who were out getting food to make french toast with. The first words spoken to me by another human being were "Hot Hot Hot", by my friend Margot smiling and pointing at my sassy skirt.

2) I was riding a muni bus with Mr. Blogger and the girl sitting in the next seat over had Tiffany and Co. shopping bag. I commented that it's every girl's dream to get something in one of those little trademark blue bags. Immediately after I said it, another girl got on the bus and sat right next to the girl with the shopping bag. Mr. Blogger pointed out that she was reading Breakfast at Tiffany's!

3) Later Mr. Blogger and I were eating at 'Q', they aren't lying when they describe their cuisine as comfort food, and I was playing with the alphabet magnets that are on the wall. I put the first letter of both of our names on the wall behind us, staking our claim of the table. Shortly after a woman leaned over and asked if she could have one of the letters because her son needed it to spell his name. I gave her the letter of my dates name, and wouldn't you know it, a minute later Mr. Blogger points and says "Look what his name is", of course, they shared the same name.

1) I hopped into my friend's car who I carpool with everyday, and she asked what I did the night before. I told her that for the first time in several weeks, no exaggeration, I stayed home alone and watched a movie. "What movie"? she asked. "The Original Get Carter", I exclaimed. Her eyes widened and her jaw dropped. "What, do you love it, what's that face"? I asked. Low and behold she too had just watched the original Get Carter last night, for the first time. Weird.

2) I left the office yesterday afternoon to catch the 5:11 Caltrain home. I said goodbye to 2 co-workers that were having a meeting in the conference room and walked a block to the station with about 7 minutes to spare. After I had been on the train for about 20 minutes I dozed off. I thought I heard someone say my name and I assumed I was dreaming. I heard it again and opened my eyes to see one of the girls that I had just left at the office sitting in the seat right in front of me. I was thoroughly confused. Apparently she decided to go ahead and go home early since she had gone in early, and just made the same train.

3) In my voice acting class there was a girl who has the same birth name as I do, Lisa. Another girl has the name that Lisa morphed into before the name I use now stuck, and that's Risa. Then there's me, you know what I'm called now. It was like all the stages of the evolution in one room.
Summer in San Francisco?
I had an incredible voice acting class last night. After recording my lively Toyota Corolla monologue, my teacher only had 2 suggestions for me, and said that she was being really picky because I was so good. I'm so proud. And then when I got home at 10:30pm, it was still very warm. I went up to my roof deck which has a phenomenal city view, and relished in the nostalgia of the last 3 fun filled years here in SF. I thought about all of the wonderfully true friends that I have, I felt excitement for starting 2 new jobs next week, and I felt satisfied that I am at long last exploring my creative talent. I couldn't help but feel like I wanted someone's company too. Warm nights are so romantic, and rare in the city. I wondered what Mr. Blogger was doing, since he's the most recent. Oh alright, since I really dug his company. I wondered if he was actually able to enjoy the evening considering he works so much. It's a real shame when you have to let go of such a good vibe. It's not often that you find a romantic interest that you click so well with ya know? Of course when someone just isn't into you it makes it a lot easier to move one. I'm glad that things ended clean after only a couple of months and that it's not terribly painful, but that doesn't discount how much I did like about him. At any rate, I hope the warm weather continues. It's good for my internal clock, helps me feel the turn of nature's wheel. Anything but partly cloudy and 60 degrees is refreshing in this little city.

My favorite thing today: Being told that my "handshake" has no doubt made the world a better place for those who've been fortunate enough to come into contact with it.

May 29, 2002

3 Is A Magic Number
Happy anniversary to me! I arrived in SF with all of my worldly possessions in a GMC Sierra extended cab just 1,095 short days ago. Things have been moving so fast that I didn't really take time to reflect after my first and second year, but I'm demonstrating some major staying power here, so three deserves a little recognition. I lived in my first flat in the city for two years and nine months which is the longest I've lived under one roof in over a decade. I'm going to recap each year at a time in my next few postings, but here are a few overall stats. Since May 29th, 1999 I have:
Filled 5 journals, spent approx $900 on Muni and Bart passes, spent approx $720 in cab fare, approx $180 in airport shuttle fees, read 52 books, bought 78 cds, sold 45 cds, ran approx 200 miles training for a marathon, and had 6 romantic interludes. This aspect warrants it's own retrospective post in itself. Stay tuned for each year in review!

My favorite thing today: The yummiest cream of mushroom soup on the planet.

May 25, 2002

My Better Half
I know women who say that they get so used to their husband's snoring. That after a while they can't sleep without it. This morning Little G actually ripped me from my sleep with his bed shaking nasal melody. How can this be? He only weighs ten pounds.

I spent three and a half hours at Kabuki Springs on Sunday. Before I went I read the pamphlet and thought "dry sauna, wet sauna, hot pool, cold pool. I should be done in about an hour or so". I overlooked the tea, the water with lemon and cucumbers, cucumber slices for the eyes, sea salt for the sauna, lounge chars, benches, Japanese showers, not to mention the overall vegetated state one succumbs to after continual pampering. Life is good.

California is full of Weirdos
Could I ever admit to anyone back in VA that I sat around with a group of friends while one of them thought of a name for the new orchid she was given as a birthday gift? Sounds perfectly normal to me.

My favorite thing today: Wet and salty kisses from 3 year-old surfers!

May 24, 2002

Smooth Talkers
I get an email from a friend this morning titled "There's someone I'd like you to meet". I know my friend. I know I'm in for a good hearty chuckle. I remember the email that he sent just after I broke up with The Brit entitled "You should call this guy". I was also looking for a job at the time and the link was from Craigslist so naturally I assumed my good friend had seen a career opportunity for me. Yep. You guessed it. The Brit was down with the tea, but not with going down on the crumpet. I saw that! That's the same face everyone made when I finally revealed my silent pain. I've considered about replying to either for more material. I love my friend for keeping me distracted while I lick my wounds.
Putting My Mouth Where The Money Is
Can I just tell you how happy I've been since I've discovered that I can make a decent living playing make-believe? I get to create little scenarios and gab and and get paid for it! Well I haven't been paid for it yet or even auditioned really.....but my training is going splendidly! I'm learning to give myself permission to let go, adlib, and make my mark. Take home excersie, practice saying "You the monster. Welcome to" in three completely different character voices or attitudes. I've tried sultry, cheerleader, and matter of factly. Suggestions?

My favorite thing today: Clearing up a misunderstanding with a friend.

May 23, 2002

Turning a New Kind of Page
I've been keeping a journal for a lot of years. The pages certainly fill quicker when I'm faced with adversity, but I like to jot down things that I'm grateful for as well, for those 'desperately adverse' times. Sometimes I get so anxious to get home and get thoughts out of my head and onto paper, that I get butterflies. I reserved my blog for entertainment purposes. I felt my inner ramblings were entirely too personal and boring to other people to share. But in the last 6 days, I have discovered a new liberation. The thrill of thinking that someone may actually read what I've written and identify with it or find it amusing has got me jazzed. I actually learned last night that the latest man had popped onto my blog recently. He once made a comment that since I don't post often, people won't check it. Fair. I thought I was completely safe posting about him. He said since we hadn't talked he wanted to see if I was writing. I'm sure I won't get anymore hits from him in the future, but it was neat to think someone cared to see what I had to say. It won't be the most articulate. It will have misspelled words. It will consist of stream-of-coniousness thoughts that only I will find amusing. That's the beauty of not striving for perfection, but trying to make a connection. I can't help but thing there may be someone who has bookmarked my page and checks back every now and again. I'm sure the owners of a lot of blogs that I peek into don't know I'm there. I'll certainly never give up blubbering with pen in hand in my comfy bed with my furry roomie curled up next to me, but I can eliminate the butterflies for the time being by getting behind the nearest pc. Guess I have the latest man to partially thank, after all, he's Mr. Blogger.
My Little Bro-Bro
I just spoke to the social services agent that has been assigned to my brother's case, and have found out absolutely NOTHING. Because I'm not hte person who initiated the concern, they cannot release information to me as Frank thought. He won't be back in town from his tugboat run until June 21st so I'm left to wonder if the case has warranted an investigation or not. Whatever they decide they will send Frank a postcard letting him know their course of action. I was able to supply more information that I felt was important, I hope it makes a difference. I hope my brother is safe.
So it turns out it was a compatability issue with the man. Not really how we get along, he enjoys my company as much as I enjoy his, he just doesn't feel that deeper connection with me as he has for others in the past. That I understand. I had just broken up with the Brit only 11 days before I met this one for that very same reason. Everyone has the right to pick and choose. That's not say to say that it doesn't SUCK when you're not chosen. At least he didn't sugar coat it with a lame excuse like we've all heard in the past, i.e. "It's not you it's me, I'm not ready now but when I am".... Hopefully in time I'll be able to give him a call and we can hang out again. He's a neat guy who I'd like to have as a friend. I'm not heartbroken, just disappointed. I've been smitten before, and I'll be smitten again!

My favorite thing today: Closure.

May 22, 2002

Pay It Forward
Last night a friend told me that his sister's husband was pulled over and busted with pot. In his military uniform. 3 months away from retirement. A month after being diagnosed with hepetitis-c. He couldn't figure out why his 43 year-old brother-in- law had pot while in uniform. He was worried about what was going to happen to his sister now that they wouldn't have guaranteed income. While my friend was visiting me his cell phone rang off the hook until he finally gave in and took the call. It was his sister with unbelievably good news. Seems her husband has lost a tremendous amount of weight since his diagnosis, and just wanted a way to find his appetite. He shared this with the cop, and the cop let him know that his own wife was just diagnosed with a terminal illness. He threw the bulk of the pot out, measured a little in a baggie, and the announced that the remainder 'wasn't even pot'. Human compassion is still out there.

My favorite thing today: The love and support of friends.

May 20, 2002

Why Does My Heart Feel So Bad?

I'm enjoying this thunderstorm today. I often complain that there isn't enough diversity in the weather here in SF as compared to VA, but today I am oddly comforted by what most consider crappy weather. We had been dating casually and happily for the last 2 months. Recently I felt myself leaning in closer and thought about initiating a conversation about where we might be headed. Last night we had "the talk", which had it gone better would have been written "last night we became a couple". I suppose I shouldn't think that all is lost just because he didn't immediately react the way I'd hoped. I'd be willing to consider a relationship that may require more effort than I'm used to giving to because I feel like the reward is worth it with him. I'm waiting to hear if he feels the same. This morning I saw pictures of us from a party we went to last weekend and we look smitten with each other. We look like we fit. There's no issue about whether or not we're compatable, it's more of priority and timing. I want to woo him, to write a "How do I like thee" list to win him over. I am confident that the universe would never present me with situations that I cannot handle, and between my brother and the man, I am surely embarking on a period of growth. My brother's case worker won't be back in the office until Thursday. Uncertainty SUCKS!

My favorite thing today: The little divot in the middle of his upper lip.

May 17, 2002

One Hundred and Eighty Degrees
Today I am so low, I want nothing more than to have someone hold me and tell me it's going to be okay.
I spoke to my youngest brother's father this morning. I don't know how much clearer I can convey to him how desperate the situation is. I've been telling him since February of this year, in graphic detail, the living conditions my brother, his son, has been living in with my lost it long ago mother. And yet as I balled my eyes out while on the phone with him, he said I must know something he doesn't if it's so bad to make me cry. He doesn't mind having to adjust his life to make room for Monty, but he says he cannot afford it. I just found out that he has a college aged son, and he pays for his tuition and car insurance. Frank says that alone takes about half of his monthly pay. I called Frank months ago regarding this because as his father, I wanted to give him the option of custody before I called social services to try and take custody of him myself, or before they put him in a foster home. I decide the fate of my brother's life. I don't know that I could provide an adequate life for him. I make enough to pay my bills and give myself small pleasures. I'd need money for his food, his clothes, child care, toys, activities, school supplies, medical care, and the countless other things that just come up. ......"Where's the humorous JupiterGIRL we all know and love"? This entry should have made it into my personal journal that I write each night. But I couldn't wait to release these woes from my noggin, and I didn't want to jot it down on paper and take the chance of someone here in the office finding it. So you're just going to have to deal with the reality that lies behind many upbeat postings. Am I ready to sacrifice my 30's to another sibling? I don't have any resentment towards Trey and K.C. It wasn't their fault that I became their make shift Mom when I was 15. And I didn't give it any thought, I just slipped into the role because they needed me. In addition to being a high school student with a part-time job I found time to cook their dinner, make their lunches, wash their clothes, dress them for school, and help with their homework. Maybe my 20's were for me, and now it's time for me to take care of someone else again. I didn't have a choice then, but now it's entirely my decision. Then my selfish voice speaks up. I am so happy with the life I have now. Sometimes things are going so well, I have to watch a sad movie to cry and keep the balance. I am truly blessed. I have an amazing circle of friends, I can provide for myself comfortably, I'm a social butterfly, I've just discovered a creative talent that I love and I'm actually good at, and who wants to date a 28 year-old woman with a 7 year-old? You know I'm the first person to find the optimistic side of semmingly hopeless, but I'm used to being a dating machine. I think I'd feel guilty flirting with someone just so that I can spring on them "By the way I have the responsibility of a school aged child". I'm sure there are plenty of nice guys who would be willing to accept this challenging situation. Can I post my ad on Craigslist now and get a head start? As I try to sit back in my chair and realax, the strength of of my heartbeat is so hard I'm involuntarily rocking back and forth.

My favorite thing today: Warm mugs of tea
Female Roommate Wanted
Some friends were joking the other night that it would be funny for a guy to run a false advert claiming 'room for rent' just to meet girls. Although it sounds like it would succeed, how would that change your attitude down the road when you discover that the way that you met your honey was not that cute happy little accident but a desperate (not to mention lazy)attempt to have girls parade through his flat for a SCAN, SELECT, DISCARD, MOVE ON session. Perhaps after you've been with him for a while and those little details would be insignificant. Perhaps your love would have grown bigger than trivial tid-bids. Perhaps you'd feel disgusted everytime you looked at him causing you to create a little pick and choose session of your own interviewing 'pool boys'.

May 15, 2002

Guerrero and Liberty Please
The last three cab drivers I've had have been HOT! I normally like making small talk with my transportation specialist, but lately I've been down right flirty. The first dashing driver gave me a lift from the Caltrain station on my way home from work at the design firm in B.F.E. He was covered in tats, with spikey hair, and had tales of his own design endeavors in the house that he just bought. Even invited me to check it out. It was just a couple of blocks away, on the shady end of Shotwell Street. I politely declined. I said he was hot, not that I'm stupid. The next casanova cabbie whisked me home after my voice acting class ran late and I needed to get ready for a party in a jiff. Blonde hair, nice tan, great smile. Between swerving lanes and tailgating, he tried to win me over by relating to the voice talent nitch. He does comedy tapes with his brother. He records the voice mails for a lot of his friends. He ran a really red light nearly ending my life. As he tried handing me his card I shouted 'gotta run', and bolted out of the rear passenger door, thanking the goddess I was alive. The final fine fare taker was a dark skin college student, who rushed me home after an interview ran late because I needed to get home to watch 24. He's going to school for international business, he was pleasant. I think he was going to drop me off on a median. He did not know what 24 was. I wished him "la bonne chance ovec l'ecole", and ran inside to find out who was betraying Jack Bauer.
These are not your parents' cabbies.

May 03, 2002

Bohunk: "Um, I'm like here to clean your pool."
Lonely Rich Housewife: "Oh, but we don't have a pool."
I, for one, believe Mrs. Lehman has a very valid point.
P.S. to Some are born with silver spoons
I found out later that day that the prices of the fine items listed below are our cost. There is an additional 40% mark up to the customer, yikes!