San Francisco Bay Area Math Test!!!

1. Zelda and Jane were given a rottweiler at their
commitment ceremony. If their dog needs to be walked
two miles a day and they walk at a rate of 3/4 mile
per hour, how much time will they spend discussing
their relationship in public?

2. Michael lives in Los Altos Hills and has two
abusive stepfathers and an alcoholic mother. If his
self-esteem is reduced by 20% per dysfunctional
parent, but Michael feels 3% better for every person
he denigrates, how long will it take before he's ready
to go home if one person walks by the window of the
sushi bar every three minutes?

3. Sanjeev has 7 piercings. If the likelihood of
getting cellulitis on a given day is 10% per piercing,
what is the likelihood that Sanjeev will need to
hitchhike to Berkeley during the next week to renew
his erythromycin prescription?

4. Chad wants to take half a pound of pot to Orinda
and sell it at a 20% profit. If it originally cost him
$1,500 in food stamps, how much should Nicole write
the check for?

5. The City and County of San Francisco decide to
destroy 50 rats infesting downtown. If 9,800 animal
rights activists hold a candlelight vigil, how many
people did each dead rat empower?

6. A red sock, a yellow sock, a blue sock, and a white
sock are tossed randomly in a drawer. What is the
likelihood that the first two socks drawn will be
socks of color?

7. George weighs 245 pounds and drinks two triple
lattes every morning while working on his laptop. If
each shot of espresso contains 490mg of caffeine, what
is George's average caffeine density in mg/pound?

8. There are 4500 homes in Mill Valley and all of them
recycle plastic. If each household recycles 10 soda
bottles a day and buys one polar fleece pullover per
month, does Mill Valley have a monthly plastic surplus
or deficit? (Bonus question: Assuming all the plastic
bottles are 1 liter size, how much Evian are they
drinking?)

9. If the average person can eat one pork pot sticker
in 30 seconds, and the waitress brings a platter of 12
pot stickers, how long will it take five vegans to not
eat them?

10. Todd begins walking down Market Street with 12 $1
bills in his wallet. If he always gives panhandlers a
single buck, how many legs did he have to step over if
he has $3 left when he reaches the other end and met
only one double-amputee?

Advanced Placement Students Only:

11. Katie, Trip, Ling, John-John and Effie share a
three-bedroom apartment on Guerrero for $2400 a month.
Effie and Trip can share one bedroom, but the other
three need their own rooms with separate ISDN lines to
run their web servers. None of them wants to use the
futon in the living room as a bed, and they each want
to save $650 in three months to attend Burning Man.
What is their best option:

a. All five roommates accept a $12/hour job-share as
handgun monitors at Mission High.

b. Ask Miles, the bisexual auto mechanic, to share
Effie and Trip's bedroom for $500/month.

c. Petition the Board of Supervisors to advance Ling
her annual digital-artists-of-color stipend.

d. Rent strike.

I added: If Dan and Renee walk down 24th Street at one block every two minutes, to go to Barney's Burgers, how many strollers will they dodge, and how many babies named Hunter will drool on their Campers?