Seperate Lives
I am partly blue. I am actually in an incredibly good mood otherwise than what I have to write about. It's a full moon, I'm going dancing with friends, I had great ideas for my new website last night, but I got an email from Big Head this morning. Oh the dramatics of Big Head both figuratively and literally (yes ladies I declare)! He was the first guy I dated when I moved to the city in June of 99. He is handsome, funny, well read, and adventurous. We dated for a few months but he started driving me crazy. I didn't want a relationship since I had just moved to the big city, we had a terrible conflict of egos, and he was just too heavy for me. We vowed never to speak to each other ever again for as long as we both should live. Despite this, he was and still is, the greatest lover of my life.
We ran into each other the following Spring and began our second affair which lasted about 4 months. It was better this time with more mind blowing sex, better communication, and meeting his parents, but I was still having fun dating other people and again he started driving me crazy. We parted this time saying we should be friends, but we didn't speak for several months.
Year three. He emailed Spring of the following year (something about that time of year) and said that he was living in San Diego and in the fall he was moving to Barcelona. We started emailing and I went down to see him a few times. We got along famously this go-round. We stopped trying to irritate one another and just hung out. We laughed, made love, went on hikes, went to a wedding together, we were growing stronger. Perhaps it was because there was no pressure of commitment since he was moving to another continent, I don't know. He left in September and we've emailed about every week since. Sometimes his emails were too dramatic and I was happy he was so far away. Other times he would get a calling card and call and I couldn't wait for him to come home this Summer. He moved to Prague shortly after Barcelona and started living with a girl and at the same time I had my first admitted boyfriend in nearly a decade. In March we both coincidentally broke up with our respective significant others within a week of each other. We decided that when he came home this Summer, he would stay with me. About a month ago he said he had started dating a girl from Scotland. I didn't think much of it, I've been busy myself if you know what I mean! A few weeks ago he announced that he wouldn't be coming home this Summer and that he and this girl were moving to Indonesia because job and living prospects were better there. He moves fast. When he emails about girls I'm always supportive, I know that when we're together he makes positively mad, and he is my friend so I should be happy for him. Today he emailed and said that he was going to ask her to marry him tonight. Why does this bother me. It's not losing him in particular forever necessarily, it's because I want someone to feel that way about me. Everyone does whether they want to admit it or not.
He is the man who has paid me the highest compliments of any man, he is the man who I can be a sex Goddess with, he's written prose and poetry about me, and he will most certainly hold a nostalgic place in my sentimental heart. I wish him the best. He is a hopeless romantic who was born to be a husband and he deserves a good partner. Hope she likes Tom Waits, YUCK!
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July 24, 2002
July 22, 2002
Who's Under the Influence
La Luna is proving her presence as usual. Yesterday I felt like everyone was giving me a weird one. One what you ask, just a tone I guess. When a situation leaves me with an uneasy feeling I say that it gave me a bad one. Yesterday things weren't bad, just odd. My friend suggested it could be the moon and she's right, it's waxing to be full on Wednesday as we speak. Last night I dreamt that I was going to take a trip to the moon. I couldn't wait to see the Earth from so far away. I had butterflies thinking about being up so high, but the danger of the expedition wasn't a concern at all. The feeling I got was that it was as safe as a plane flight, but not everyone is given the opportunity. Dreams like this regain my faith in my imagination. Sometimes I feel like too much of a grown-up concerning myself with stuff like my financial obligations or my career path. I never dream about work or money, or anything stressful for that matter, but my mind is so active, that in my dreams I'm usually plotting, not really feeling free. Once I dreamt that I was swimming in my apartment lobby with turtles and dolphins. Amazing considering I fear being under water. I woke up from that dream feeling revived and centered. Once I dreamt that I was flying over a forest and I could actually smell the moist earth and I could feel the sensation of being weightless. I woke feeling rested and empowered. What's been your best dream?
La Luna is proving her presence as usual. Yesterday I felt like everyone was giving me a weird one. One what you ask, just a tone I guess. When a situation leaves me with an uneasy feeling I say that it gave me a bad one. Yesterday things weren't bad, just odd. My friend suggested it could be the moon and she's right, it's waxing to be full on Wednesday as we speak. Last night I dreamt that I was going to take a trip to the moon. I couldn't wait to see the Earth from so far away. I had butterflies thinking about being up so high, but the danger of the expedition wasn't a concern at all. The feeling I got was that it was as safe as a plane flight, but not everyone is given the opportunity. Dreams like this regain my faith in my imagination. Sometimes I feel like too much of a grown-up concerning myself with stuff like my financial obligations or my career path. I never dream about work or money, or anything stressful for that matter, but my mind is so active, that in my dreams I'm usually plotting, not really feeling free. Once I dreamt that I was swimming in my apartment lobby with turtles and dolphins. Amazing considering I fear being under water. I woke up from that dream feeling revived and centered. Once I dreamt that I was flying over a forest and I could actually smell the moist earth and I could feel the sensation of being weightless. I woke feeling rested and empowered. What's been your best dream?
Ignorant
When people say that they found something in the last place that they looked, do they really mean that there was no where else they would have looked anyway, or that because they found it and they didn't need to look any more, that made the place where they found it the last place they looked? I was always thought the former until just this minute.
When people say that they found something in the last place that they looked, do they really mean that there was no where else they would have looked anyway, or that because they found it and they didn't need to look any more, that made the place where they found it the last place they looked? I was always thought the former until just this minute.
July 16, 2002
swf ISO
funny material for her blog! Today I browsed the on-line dating service Lavalife. Ready to have some fun? Open another internet window, log on, click intimate encounters, and search by nicknames. Let me know if I'm responsible for a Love connection!
In the 'aggressive realm' we have troy31. Okay, this guy says he's looking for fun. Yeah! If fun means kicking someone's ass! tattoedwhiteboy is very proud of his body art and ruahorny1 gets right to the point.
We have the 'I'm too sexy' crew with rustafarian an imitation Calvin Klein Ad, and fun tall lover the 1980's calendar boy. The sub-category here being the 'I'm looking to be dicovered' talent. sexystudent2 looks like an advert for a dandruff shampoo and tstl2002 is a future soap star. An even subber category here is the 'deep and artsy' pictorial. buxguy is your local alley poet, while thornfield is more of a tortured visual artist.
There are the 'the only good picture of me is with another girl' club. brian1310 has done a neat job cropping in photoshop. I'm curious to know where his hands were in dabull's picture. exhippy is a member of this club as well as a Kevin Bacon look-a-like, jeffrey19 has found out the arm is a pesky body part to get rid of, jaesun is the vice president for signing his ad with the keyboard character equivalent of boobies, and the president of this club is sockmonky who went to great lengths to omit the scene all together in which this picture was taken.
Miscellaneous ads of note include alwayson. No wonder this guy is single, he doesn't even have the female anatomy right. bowen t is our very own modern day Pan, while inkedfireman uses a tag line that I swear I've seen on a t-shirt. There were too many pictures of men with dogs and men on motorcycles to even begin to pick apart, with the exception of acnalla. High top sneakers with no socks, what girl could resist? magickman9 evidentially intends on casting a spell on you from his mother's living room sofa, just look at the way his hands are innocently folded in his lap, yikes!
And finally, a cluster I could have never imagined having to mention, pictures of men with fish. That's right, pandabear30, happymeter, and teddyluv1's think you're a nice piece of 'bass' and they won't know weather to mount you or eat you!
Be selective ladies and always carry repellant.
funny material for her blog! Today I browsed the on-line dating service Lavalife. Ready to have some fun? Open another internet window, log on, click intimate encounters, and search by nicknames. Let me know if I'm responsible for a Love connection!
In the 'aggressive realm' we have troy31. Okay, this guy says he's looking for fun. Yeah! If fun means kicking someone's ass! tattoedwhiteboy is very proud of his body art and ruahorny1 gets right to the point.
We have the 'I'm too sexy' crew with rustafarian an imitation Calvin Klein Ad, and fun tall lover the 1980's calendar boy. The sub-category here being the 'I'm looking to be dicovered' talent. sexystudent2 looks like an advert for a dandruff shampoo and tstl2002 is a future soap star. An even subber category here is the 'deep and artsy' pictorial. buxguy is your local alley poet, while thornfield is more of a tortured visual artist.
There are the 'the only good picture of me is with another girl' club. brian1310 has done a neat job cropping in photoshop. I'm curious to know where his hands were in dabull's picture. exhippy is a member of this club as well as a Kevin Bacon look-a-like, jeffrey19 has found out the arm is a pesky body part to get rid of, jaesun is the vice president for signing his ad with the keyboard character equivalent of boobies, and the president of this club is sockmonky who went to great lengths to omit the scene all together in which this picture was taken.
Miscellaneous ads of note include alwayson. No wonder this guy is single, he doesn't even have the female anatomy right. bowen t is our very own modern day Pan, while inkedfireman uses a tag line that I swear I've seen on a t-shirt. There were too many pictures of men with dogs and men on motorcycles to even begin to pick apart, with the exception of acnalla. High top sneakers with no socks, what girl could resist? magickman9 evidentially intends on casting a spell on you from his mother's living room sofa, just look at the way his hands are innocently folded in his lap, yikes!
And finally, a cluster I could have never imagined having to mention, pictures of men with fish. That's right, pandabear30, happymeter, and teddyluv1's think you're a nice piece of 'bass' and they won't know weather to mount you or eat you!
Be selective ladies and always carry repellant.
July 12, 2002
I've Let My Cat Take Control of My Dating Life
So I posted an ad on Craigslist for a down mattress cover I wanted to sell. Only one person inquired, and he came and picked it up last night. He came in and my furball loved him. My cat typically runs and hides under the bed when new people first come in, and he doesn't usually even come back out if it's a man. (especially bald men. he does not trust the skinheads) But this guy was really tall, and had hair, and Lil G kept nuzzling his ankles. As he left it felt like 'a moment' and this morning I entertained the idea of calling him and asking him out, but he beat me to the punch. He emailed and said he had a great night's sleep, and asked me out for a drink sometime. I accepted.
So I posted an ad on Craigslist for a down mattress cover I wanted to sell. Only one person inquired, and he came and picked it up last night. He came in and my furball loved him. My cat typically runs and hides under the bed when new people first come in, and he doesn't usually even come back out if it's a man. (especially bald men. he does not trust the skinheads) But this guy was really tall, and had hair, and Lil G kept nuzzling his ankles. As he left it felt like 'a moment' and this morning I entertained the idea of calling him and asking him out, but he beat me to the punch. He emailed and said he had a great night's sleep, and asked me out for a drink sometime. I accepted.
I'm Beginning to See a Pattern Here
Earlier this year I had a boyfriend, The Brit. He had a very common last name. The next guy I dated was the one that was the first person I knew with an uncommon first name, Mr. Blogger, but his middle name was my ex's last name. Hmmm. I've just been asked out by a guy who's last name is a form of Mr. Bloggers first name. I'm sure skeptics would say that if you dug deep enough, you could find some sort of a connection between anyone or anything. I say skeptics are assholes.
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My favorite thing today: Discovering I now have The Cartoon Network!!!!!
Earlier this year I had a boyfriend, The Brit. He had a very common last name. The next guy I dated was the one that was the first person I knew with an uncommon first name, Mr. Blogger, but his middle name was my ex's last name. Hmmm. I've just been asked out by a guy who's last name is a form of Mr. Bloggers first name. I'm sure skeptics would say that if you dug deep enough, you could find some sort of a connection between anyone or anything. I say skeptics are assholes.
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My favorite thing today: Discovering I now have The Cartoon Network!!!!!
July 08, 2002
Oy! To Da Bem?
When I last left you, I had a "which cute boy" dilemma. It soon took care of itself. By late Wednesday night I was practically on the verge of eenie-meenie-minie-mo when the Electrician called and said he couldn't make it because he had gotten into a car accident and didn't have a way up to the city. Nobody was hurt, he hit a parked car, after drinking and 'other stuff'. Women's intuition told me it was a cock-and-bull story so he did me a favor really. If it was a lie then that's not cool. If he was drinking and driving, then that's really not cool. So after his phone call I called Saucy to tell her I'd be coming in on the Caltrain first thing in the morning. Shortly after hanging up my phone rang and I thought it would be Saucy, but no, it was cutie beanie (as in the hat not the baby) boy that I had met at Minna just a couple of weeks ago. He and the friend that introduced us were going out for a drink and wanted to know if I'd be up for joining them. Even though I was already in my jammies at my neighbor friend's house steeping a lovely mug of chamomile tea, I agreed. My neighbor friend and her brother went with me too. He was still handsome, but he said 'dude' and 'fuck' quite a bit. I wouldn't mind going out with him when he's not drinking to see if it gets better. He's supposed to call this week.
So Thursday I went down to Santa Cruz and enjoyed the greatest 4th of July of my adult life! I was at the beach house party of Santa Cruz with my film maker friend on the corner of Seabright and Eastcliff and no doubt you could hear us all the way back here in SF, I know you could at least 2 blocks in every direction down there. As I danced on the enormous balcony with about 30 other hooters and hollerers, I shouted to all of the men as they passed "Show me your tits"! After they'd lift their shirts I'd heckle "Are they real"? I danced, and danced, and danced, and even danced a little to a clear sound system with 4-foot speakers pulsating with the energy of great local DJ talent. We partied so hard we blew every fuse in the house. There was a wholesome family picnic going on at the house across the street. A handful of middle-aged adults and small children where a little boy of about 5 kept peeking around the corner of the garage on his tricycle to get another look at what must have looked like the wild monkeys jumping around in their cage like he'd seen at the zoo, and a little girl of about 7 who would prance around and mock us by shaking her hips and throwing her hands up in the air (like she just didn't care). There isn't a fireworks display put on by the city, so as soon as the sun started to go down, the local pyromaniacs came out to play. The beach was covered with spurting flames and thick smoke, but I managed to find my way down to the drum circle and chanted along with the hippies for a few beats before Saucy and I made our way back to her house via bicycle, which is NOT easy after 5 hours of dancing and libations.
Friday I took it easy and stuck around Saucy's house, and I mean eeee-zeeee. I had napped twice by 4pm. Later that night I was supposed to get together with Heavenly Nostrils, but over the course of the evening, all the way until midnight thirty in fact, I became frustrated that he didn't seem to be putting forth any effort to come and see me, so I just went for a comfy dinner at a friend's house. He'd call every couple of hours and tell me where he was, and ask me to join him, but when I suggested he come by my friend's house, or meet us at a local dive for a game of pool, he'd decline.
So Saturday Saucy and I were hanging out on the beach with our new Brazilian friends, when Heavenly Nostrils called and invited us to a pool party. Saucy was game because there would be boy she had met at Super Booty there was well. We tootled on over and o-my-gawd what a shit he was. First he didn't open the door when we knocked for five minutes, even though I had just spoken to him from the damn parking lot, and then he ignored me the entire afternoon. There wound up being about 10 of us there, hanging out in the pool and he'd go inside his apartment, come out with a couple of beers and toss them to the other boys, and sit right down, never asking if we wanted anything. I have to admit that I shouldn't have expected much because this boy is young, young, young, but I was pre-occupied with my lust of the flesh, and ignored the red flags. Saucy was still interested in the guy she was talking to even though he was pretty quiet, she passed it off as shy, and I was getting along with another guy there who was very attentive, (and both were over 30) so we asked those boys out for later that night. We jaunted off and headed out to a friend's bbq with a live reggae band, dogs and kids, a real old fashion bbq, it was sweet. A couple of paper cups of brew later, and we went to meet our dates at the Palomar. Painful. Like a bamboo reed under my fingernail. Saucy's man wasn't shy, he was just mind numbingly boring. Never cracked a smile the whole night. And my guy showed up about 2 feet shorter than I had earlier speculated. He was lying in a lounge chair the whole time at the pool party. I joke to my friend "Damn what did he do, go home wet after swimming and shrink himself in the dryer? He too didn't laugh at a damn joke I threw his way. Okay, I'll rephrase my remarks for my karma's sake. They weren't boring, we just didn't jive, how's that? BUT, their fifth wheel friend who they brought with them, who looks like an even more handsome Chris Isaac, who was also at the pool party, was super cool, and I wound up talking to him the whole night. Yes, I'm already working on an angle to get in touch with him next but I have to be delicate. I was invited to the pool party by one, asked another from the same pool party out for that night, and now I want the skinny on a third pool party attendee? Don't give that look, you have no right to judge!
Sunday Saucy and I made a nice bacon and egg b-fast with our film maker friend and then walked down to play in the sand. I actually swam (I use the term swam extremely loosely) in the Pacific Ocean for the first time. It's cold. A big wave spanked me and I thought I was going to die. After tumbling and sucking in salt water for what felt like an hour, I emerged from my near death experience in an only inch of water. My suit was twisted, my pigtails soaked and uneven. I wanted to believe that everyone on the beach was too busy having fun to notice, but I'm thinking they were just being nice and looked away when I started coughing up sand like a cat does a furball. I walked back to Saucy's feeling defeated by Mother Ocean. I wanted to go home. That's when I found out that I'd be bussing it all the way back to city since Caltrain no longer runs on weekends, and it took me well over 4 hours to get back to Liberty Hall. Pheeeew. You're tired just from reading this post, imagine how I feel. I'm off to my chambers now.
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Pick up line #01: Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like spaghetti. Let's go screw.
When I last left you, I had a "which cute boy" dilemma. It soon took care of itself. By late Wednesday night I was practically on the verge of eenie-meenie-minie-mo when the Electrician called and said he couldn't make it because he had gotten into a car accident and didn't have a way up to the city. Nobody was hurt, he hit a parked car, after drinking and 'other stuff'. Women's intuition told me it was a cock-and-bull story so he did me a favor really. If it was a lie then that's not cool. If he was drinking and driving, then that's really not cool. So after his phone call I called Saucy to tell her I'd be coming in on the Caltrain first thing in the morning. Shortly after hanging up my phone rang and I thought it would be Saucy, but no, it was cutie beanie (as in the hat not the baby) boy that I had met at Minna just a couple of weeks ago. He and the friend that introduced us were going out for a drink and wanted to know if I'd be up for joining them. Even though I was already in my jammies at my neighbor friend's house steeping a lovely mug of chamomile tea, I agreed. My neighbor friend and her brother went with me too. He was still handsome, but he said 'dude' and 'fuck' quite a bit. I wouldn't mind going out with him when he's not drinking to see if it gets better. He's supposed to call this week.
So Thursday I went down to Santa Cruz and enjoyed the greatest 4th of July of my adult life! I was at the beach house party of Santa Cruz with my film maker friend on the corner of Seabright and Eastcliff and no doubt you could hear us all the way back here in SF, I know you could at least 2 blocks in every direction down there. As I danced on the enormous balcony with about 30 other hooters and hollerers, I shouted to all of the men as they passed "Show me your tits"! After they'd lift their shirts I'd heckle "Are they real"? I danced, and danced, and danced, and even danced a little to a clear sound system with 4-foot speakers pulsating with the energy of great local DJ talent. We partied so hard we blew every fuse in the house. There was a wholesome family picnic going on at the house across the street. A handful of middle-aged adults and small children where a little boy of about 5 kept peeking around the corner of the garage on his tricycle to get another look at what must have looked like the wild monkeys jumping around in their cage like he'd seen at the zoo, and a little girl of about 7 who would prance around and mock us by shaking her hips and throwing her hands up in the air (like she just didn't care). There isn't a fireworks display put on by the city, so as soon as the sun started to go down, the local pyromaniacs came out to play. The beach was covered with spurting flames and thick smoke, but I managed to find my way down to the drum circle and chanted along with the hippies for a few beats before Saucy and I made our way back to her house via bicycle, which is NOT easy after 5 hours of dancing and libations.
Friday I took it easy and stuck around Saucy's house, and I mean eeee-zeeee. I had napped twice by 4pm. Later that night I was supposed to get together with Heavenly Nostrils, but over the course of the evening, all the way until midnight thirty in fact, I became frustrated that he didn't seem to be putting forth any effort to come and see me, so I just went for a comfy dinner at a friend's house. He'd call every couple of hours and tell me where he was, and ask me to join him, but when I suggested he come by my friend's house, or meet us at a local dive for a game of pool, he'd decline.
So Saturday Saucy and I were hanging out on the beach with our new Brazilian friends, when Heavenly Nostrils called and invited us to a pool party. Saucy was game because there would be boy she had met at Super Booty there was well. We tootled on over and o-my-gawd what a shit he was. First he didn't open the door when we knocked for five minutes, even though I had just spoken to him from the damn parking lot, and then he ignored me the entire afternoon. There wound up being about 10 of us there, hanging out in the pool and he'd go inside his apartment, come out with a couple of beers and toss them to the other boys, and sit right down, never asking if we wanted anything. I have to admit that I shouldn't have expected much because this boy is young, young, young, but I was pre-occupied with my lust of the flesh, and ignored the red flags. Saucy was still interested in the guy she was talking to even though he was pretty quiet, she passed it off as shy, and I was getting along with another guy there who was very attentive, (and both were over 30) so we asked those boys out for later that night. We jaunted off and headed out to a friend's bbq with a live reggae band, dogs and kids, a real old fashion bbq, it was sweet. A couple of paper cups of brew later, and we went to meet our dates at the Palomar. Painful. Like a bamboo reed under my fingernail. Saucy's man wasn't shy, he was just mind numbingly boring. Never cracked a smile the whole night. And my guy showed up about 2 feet shorter than I had earlier speculated. He was lying in a lounge chair the whole time at the pool party. I joke to my friend "Damn what did he do, go home wet after swimming and shrink himself in the dryer? He too didn't laugh at a damn joke I threw his way. Okay, I'll rephrase my remarks for my karma's sake. They weren't boring, we just didn't jive, how's that? BUT, their fifth wheel friend who they brought with them, who looks like an even more handsome Chris Isaac, who was also at the pool party, was super cool, and I wound up talking to him the whole night. Yes, I'm already working on an angle to get in touch with him next but I have to be delicate. I was invited to the pool party by one, asked another from the same pool party out for that night, and now I want the skinny on a third pool party attendee? Don't give that look, you have no right to judge!
Sunday Saucy and I made a nice bacon and egg b-fast with our film maker friend and then walked down to play in the sand. I actually swam (I use the term swam extremely loosely) in the Pacific Ocean for the first time. It's cold. A big wave spanked me and I thought I was going to die. After tumbling and sucking in salt water for what felt like an hour, I emerged from my near death experience in an only inch of water. My suit was twisted, my pigtails soaked and uneven. I wanted to believe that everyone on the beach was too busy having fun to notice, but I'm thinking they were just being nice and looked away when I started coughing up sand like a cat does a furball. I walked back to Saucy's feeling defeated by Mother Ocean. I wanted to go home. That's when I found out that I'd be bussing it all the way back to city since Caltrain no longer runs on weekends, and it took me well over 4 hours to get back to Liberty Hall. Pheeeew. You're tired just from reading this post, imagine how I feel. I'm off to my chambers now.
qr
Pick up line #01: Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like spaghetti. Let's go screw.
Transportation Update
Caltrain will not run on weekends for the next 2 years due to work on the tracks. Do not ride the train down to Santa Cruz on a Thursday thinking you will be riding it back to the city on Sunday. There are buses running the same route, for the same price, but not nearly as often as the usual Caltrain schedule. Oh, and you may be waiting an hour and a half for the next bus in the station with 22 obnoxious pre-pubescent Christian teen-agers who've just returned from a camping trip, all with braces smacking on junk food.
Caltrain will not run on weekends for the next 2 years due to work on the tracks. Do not ride the train down to Santa Cruz on a Thursday thinking you will be riding it back to the city on Sunday. There are buses running the same route, for the same price, but not nearly as often as the usual Caltrain schedule. Oh, and you may be waiting an hour and a half for the next bus in the station with 22 obnoxious pre-pubescent Christian teen-agers who've just returned from a camping trip, all with braces smacking on junk food.
July 03, 2002
Of Mice with Men
Yesterday a co-worker of mine got frustrated and expressed so by saying it felt like, and I quote "a red hot poker up a gerbil's ass". I giggled but then piped up with our office safe word "inappropriate", purely in jest. He went on to add in a sadistic tone with a smile "but there fur is so soft". Conversation regarding design resumed for about five minutes and then he looked over asked me "why is their fur so soft"?, with seemingly genuine interest. I answered matter of factly, that an animal's coat has a lot to do with their diet. eeeeewwwww. It may have been one of those 'guess you had to be there' moments, but as your queen I order you to get it, and laugh hysterically as if you had been.
Yesterday a co-worker of mine got frustrated and expressed so by saying it felt like, and I quote "a red hot poker up a gerbil's ass". I giggled but then piped up with our office safe word "inappropriate", purely in jest. He went on to add in a sadistic tone with a smile "but there fur is so soft". Conversation regarding design resumed for about five minutes and then he looked over asked me "why is their fur so soft"?, with seemingly genuine interest. I answered matter of factly, that an animal's coat has a lot to do with their diet. eeeeewwwww. It may have been one of those 'guess you had to be there' moments, but as your queen I order you to get it, and laugh hysterically as if you had been.
The New Definition of Double Dating
Remember that Brady Bunch episode where Marcia asks a boy to the school dance and then says yes to another boy, totally forgetting she asked the first boy? Well I certainly didn't forget that I asked the Electrician to the 4th of July bbq, but I gave him 24 hours to respond and heard nothing, so I called for back up and invited Heavenly Nostrils who said he'd love to, but then a few hours later I got a voicemail from the Electrician accpeting the invite as well, and now I don't know who to pick because I don't know either of them well enough to know who I would want to have as a date since now I have to pick one or the other. Of course I could always accept Saucy's invite and just go down to Santa Cruz and spend a day at the beach with each of them! What's a girl to do? Can you belive this is the worst of my 'problems' right now. Everyone else should be so lucky.
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Remember that Brady Bunch episode where Marcia asks a boy to the school dance and then says yes to another boy, totally forgetting she asked the first boy? Well I certainly didn't forget that I asked the Electrician to the 4th of July bbq, but I gave him 24 hours to respond and heard nothing, so I called for back up and invited Heavenly Nostrils who said he'd love to, but then a few hours later I got a voicemail from the Electrician accpeting the invite as well, and now I don't know who to pick because I don't know either of them well enough to know who I would want to have as a date since now I have to pick one or the other. Of course I could always accept Saucy's invite and just go down to Santa Cruz and spend a day at the beach with each of them! What's a girl to do? Can you belive this is the worst of my 'problems' right now. Everyone else should be so lucky.
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July 02, 2002
Would someone help me down from my soapbox please?
Every morning I pass a splendid smelling rotisserie on Mission and 20th. I've been a vegetarian for about 6 years, but recently since the fast, I've entertained the idea of incorporating healthy, hormone free meat into my diet. The other morning as I passed the diner of flesh, I slowed my pace to breathe in the aroma for as long as I could. I glanced inside and noticed a worker doing prep work for the day. Dressed in his standard issue white t-shirt and white apron, peeling and slicing a vibrant orange carrot, while no more than 6 inches away, sat an ashtray with a cigarette burning to infinity. I watched him finish with the carrot, take a nice deep drag of his cancer stick, and then resume handling the fine vegetables. He didn't rinse his fingers, or even move the ashtray when he noticed me peering in. The poor little carrot didn't stand a chance. I will from now on laugh heartily when I see people shun eating meat in public establishments for hygienic reasons.
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My favorite thing today: A savory shrimp and scallop crepe, followed by a sweet white chocolate crepe from Ti Couz, manufique!
Every morning I pass a splendid smelling rotisserie on Mission and 20th. I've been a vegetarian for about 6 years, but recently since the fast, I've entertained the idea of incorporating healthy, hormone free meat into my diet. The other morning as I passed the diner of flesh, I slowed my pace to breathe in the aroma for as long as I could. I glanced inside and noticed a worker doing prep work for the day. Dressed in his standard issue white t-shirt and white apron, peeling and slicing a vibrant orange carrot, while no more than 6 inches away, sat an ashtray with a cigarette burning to infinity. I watched him finish with the carrot, take a nice deep drag of his cancer stick, and then resume handling the fine vegetables. He didn't rinse his fingers, or even move the ashtray when he noticed me peering in. The poor little carrot didn't stand a chance. I will from now on laugh heartily when I see people shun eating meat in public establishments for hygienic reasons.
qr
My favorite thing today: A savory shrimp and scallop crepe, followed by a sweet white chocolate crepe from Ti Couz, manufique!
July 01, 2002
Fobs and Pods
Sounds like characters from a children's show right? Wrong! It's City Carshare jargon. I used this miraculous service for the first time on Saturday. My neighbor friend and I strolled down to the 'pod', waved our little 'fob', tuned in to 92.7fm, and be-bopped all the way to the farmer's market in South San Francisco. We picked up some nice organic goodies and headed back to the city for Costco. I feel like an elf at Costco. And because it's all at such a savings, you lose sight of the fact that you will never actually use a 12 pack of 64oz. bottles of Drano. Well you might, in which case I do not want to know. With our two pack 84 oz. shower gel and family of 12 sized packages of lobster ravioli in cardboard boxes, we were en route for Trader Joe's where I stocked up on enough food to get me through the week. I will soon not forget the joy of purchasing anything my little heart desires, without the worry of how I'm going to get it home. While I filled my cart to the brim with whatever I could get my hands on, my neighbor friend walked over to Bed Bath and Beyond (insert angels singing) and grabbed 4 bags of god knows what and who cares because we can finally do this. We were certainly making use of the VW Beetle's tiny trunk and back seat, holy balancing act. We zipped home to drop off our booty, and returned the bug with a few minutes to spare. I'm already thinking about the agenda for our next carshare adventure. I think next time we'll have to take the VW Jetta Wagon for a spin and make a bee line for IKEA!!
Sounds like characters from a children's show right? Wrong! It's City Carshare jargon. I used this miraculous service for the first time on Saturday. My neighbor friend and I strolled down to the 'pod', waved our little 'fob', tuned in to 92.7fm, and be-bopped all the way to the farmer's market in South San Francisco. We picked up some nice organic goodies and headed back to the city for Costco. I feel like an elf at Costco. And because it's all at such a savings, you lose sight of the fact that you will never actually use a 12 pack of 64oz. bottles of Drano. Well you might, in which case I do not want to know. With our two pack 84 oz. shower gel and family of 12 sized packages of lobster ravioli in cardboard boxes, we were en route for Trader Joe's where I stocked up on enough food to get me through the week. I will soon not forget the joy of purchasing anything my little heart desires, without the worry of how I'm going to get it home. While I filled my cart to the brim with whatever I could get my hands on, my neighbor friend walked over to Bed Bath and Beyond (insert angels singing) and grabbed 4 bags of god knows what and who cares because we can finally do this. We were certainly making use of the VW Beetle's tiny trunk and back seat, holy balancing act. We zipped home to drop off our booty, and returned the bug with a few minutes to spare. I'm already thinking about the agenda for our next carshare adventure. I think next time we'll have to take the VW Jetta Wagon for a spin and make a bee line for IKEA!!
June 27, 2002
June 26, 2002
I Disavow
I recently discovered that an ex was upset over something written about him on my blog. I'm ashamed to say that at first I was more excited that I had another reader besides my devoted Aunt in Va rather than being concerned that I hurt someone's feelings. But eventually I did feel bad. I'm the queen but not the ice queen. I didn't feel bad enough to start editing my content, I use pseudonyms for crying out loud, but I will take the time to add this here little waiver:
I, the author of this blog, do hereby relieve myself of any physical, spiritual, or karmic liability for any tid-bids that I post regarding any ex-boyfriends/lovers/first dates etc. To the best of my knowledge I had only one confirmed reader, my loyal Aunt who resides on the complete opposite side of this our great U.S. of A, who has no personal connection to any mentioned parties, therefore protecting your identity. If an ex or a friend of an ex happens along my URL and figures out which nickname for which the ex is the basis, the ex at this point should deny it. Deny it until the day you die, and forever regret your involvement with me. Feel free to ignore me or glare at me the next time we cross paths.
The friend of the ex should keep this new found teasing material solely to himself and everyone the ex knows, and subtly drop snide remarks when appropriate, and give me a knowing look and a smirk the next time we cross paths.
For a select few formerly romantically involved individuals mentioned with fondness, send your majesty a gift promptly to show gratitude for the ego biscuit for which you have been tossed. Bow before me the next time we cross paths.
qr
I recently discovered that an ex was upset over something written about him on my blog. I'm ashamed to say that at first I was more excited that I had another reader besides my devoted Aunt in Va rather than being concerned that I hurt someone's feelings. But eventually I did feel bad. I'm the queen but not the ice queen. I didn't feel bad enough to start editing my content, I use pseudonyms for crying out loud, but I will take the time to add this here little waiver:
I, the author of this blog, do hereby relieve myself of any physical, spiritual, or karmic liability for any tid-bids that I post regarding any ex-boyfriends/lovers/first dates etc. To the best of my knowledge I had only one confirmed reader, my loyal Aunt who resides on the complete opposite side of this our great U.S. of A, who has no personal connection to any mentioned parties, therefore protecting your identity. If an ex or a friend of an ex happens along my URL and figures out which nickname for which the ex is the basis, the ex at this point should deny it. Deny it until the day you die, and forever regret your involvement with me. Feel free to ignore me or glare at me the next time we cross paths.
The friend of the ex should keep this new found teasing material solely to himself and everyone the ex knows, and subtly drop snide remarks when appropriate, and give me a knowing look and a smirk the next time we cross paths.
For a select few formerly romantically involved individuals mentioned with fondness, send your majesty a gift promptly to show gratitude for the ego biscuit for which you have been tossed. Bow before me the next time we cross paths.
qr
Menacing Muni
When I lived on Jones and Sutter, my room was the corner room right on the street. I had the #2, #3, #4 muni lines that stopped under my window on Sutter, and the #27 that stopped under my window on Jones. After about a year, the #27 became equipped with a really loud announcement for the blind stating the bus line and destination that echoed through our flat each time it made it's stop under my window. Every seven to eleven minutes I heard a mechanical female voice bellow "27 Bryant- to-Cesar Chavez". Sometimes I would think that I had heard it even when I hadn't. It was annoying as hell, but my roommate and I knew it was a necessary feature, and tried to make light of it. We would mouth along with the faceless voice and make funny faces. When I moved to the Mission a few months ago I was delighted to get away from the blasted muni line. No more shouting announcement and no more puff of thick black smoke seeping in my window every time the buses took off. A couple of weeks ago I was sitting at my desk of my new job, and I could have sworn I heard the familiar jingle of the bus's presence. I thought maybe I was having a flashback. (to be read like a war veteran)"Hi, I'm Reese and I served time on Jones and Sutter and NOW I'LL NEVER BE THE SAME"! "I can still hear the MESSAGE LOUD AND CLEAR"! I looked out of the window immediately to my left, and there stood the spewing beast. There is a stop no more than 50 feet from my window. It's tracked me down. It's relentless. It is my fate. Help me.
When I lived on Jones and Sutter, my room was the corner room right on the street. I had the #2, #3, #4 muni lines that stopped under my window on Sutter, and the #27 that stopped under my window on Jones. After about a year, the #27 became equipped with a really loud announcement for the blind stating the bus line and destination that echoed through our flat each time it made it's stop under my window. Every seven to eleven minutes I heard a mechanical female voice bellow "27 Bryant- to-Cesar Chavez". Sometimes I would think that I had heard it even when I hadn't. It was annoying as hell, but my roommate and I knew it was a necessary feature, and tried to make light of it. We would mouth along with the faceless voice and make funny faces. When I moved to the Mission a few months ago I was delighted to get away from the blasted muni line. No more shouting announcement and no more puff of thick black smoke seeping in my window every time the buses took off. A couple of weeks ago I was sitting at my desk of my new job, and I could have sworn I heard the familiar jingle of the bus's presence. I thought maybe I was having a flashback. (to be read like a war veteran)"Hi, I'm Reese and I served time on Jones and Sutter and NOW I'LL NEVER BE THE SAME"! "I can still hear the MESSAGE LOUD AND CLEAR"! I looked out of the window immediately to my left, and there stood the spewing beast. There is a stop no more than 50 feet from my window. It's tracked me down. It's relentless. It is my fate. Help me.
June 25, 2002
Full Moon Mayhem
Yeah, it was the moon, the moon made me do it! Was it me who just a week ago wrote that my life was nice and calm at the moment? The forecast has just called for flurries! My intention was just to celebrate a nice relaxing Summer Solstice weekend with the girls, honestly! Friday and Saturday night, come home early Sunday on the 10am Caltrain. BUT-I ditched work on Friday (note to self: do not give co-workers blogspot url) and rode Caltrain down with my sweet friend OB1 on Thursday night and I didn't get home until midnight on Sunday. Thursday we stayed in Santa Clara with my friend Saucy who was house sitting. We had a nice evening of gab, walked the dog, and helped Saucy get her Solstice gifts in order. She had gotten her close friends a nice Cala Lilly and handmade cards. We got up at 5am, and left these trinkets of joy on everyone's doorstep, just like little Solstice fairies. While out on our sunrise mission, there was a guy driving next to us who nearly broke his neck trying to get a closer look at 3 girls in a car. When we approached the next stop light, he moved over in the opposite lane and put his passenger window down. We stayed about 2 car lengths behind. The freaks don't just come out at night my friends.
Friday Saucy had to work so OB1 and I headed downtown for a little brunch, a little consignment shop shopping, and a nice rest in the park. Later for dinner Saucy introduced us to Charlie Hong Kong's. Not exactly traditional Asian dishes, but dirt cheap and bowl cleaning tasty. We wound up taking it easy that night and rented Ocean's Eleven which is a 90 minute non-stop visual treat for women.
Saturday a group of us went to Walnut Avenue for my favorite eggs benedict in the world, the Blackened Ahi Benedict. Scrumdiliocous. Saturday OB1 went home early because she felt like she was catching a cold. After brunch the rest of us girls went to the beach. Saucy, her roommate, Saucy's friend and me. Saucy's friends the Electrician and Weasel stopped by, the Electrician is devastatingly handsome, very Kennedyesque. Along came Super Booty Boy. Not just because he has one, but he's in the band! They're an ultra-fun 70's cover band. He's a really nice guy too, Saucy dated him a while back, but now they're friends. So he invites us to the show that night, puts us on the list, and now the girls have plans to go out dancing! I popped downtown to pick up a Super Booty worthy mini dress and borrowed Saucy's knee high black boots, I felt saucy myself. Saucy wore this outstanding clingy white satin jumpsuit with an exposed mid-driff, she was hot stuff! We had a blast getting ready, listening to dance music and drinking beer. The apartment looked like a war zone as we bolted out the door. Four fabulous girls headed out together, but we didn't wind up going home together, some of us didn't go home at all!
We went to the club and bought ourselves a beer and began chatting away with everyone around us. A guy at the bar bought me my second beer so I made small talk with him and his friend. They get up to the city a lot, but the type of clubs thy named told me they were cheeseballs. Mid conversation I looked over and recognized the Electrician from the beach earlier. Left the two guys at the bar like an ungrateful wench, and took the Electrician by the arm. "Well hello blue eyes" I greeted him. He was wearing a funky afro wig, and groovy shirt, I like a guy who gets into character. Saucy had already been chatting up some buff guy and a guy who said he was just waking up. I went upstairs to partake in a sweet clove cigarette (my first one in AGES) where I engaged in small talk with a cutie pie with Elvis sunglasses, and caught eyes with even cuter cutie pie with the hottest nostrils going. Everyone already knows about my nose fetish right? I'm walking downstairs to get back to dancing with my girls and I'm approached by a pretty Latin boy who's name I can't remember. He grabbed my hand as we pushed through the crowd towards the stage, but as I bumped into the Electrician, I let go of Latin man's hand. Am I bad or what? I'd chat with one boy while waiting for the bathroom, another while dancing, another while walking from the powder room to the dance floor, I was dizzy, I felt like a pinball. I could barely keep them straight. Saucy had several plates of her own spinning during the evening. In addition to the two from earlier she'd added a 6' 4" film maker, and Pizza Boy, a guy she's been dating for a couple of weeks showed up as well. THEN Super Booty boy decided to confess his sappy feeling to her, like I said before, the moon was in full effect.
As the band left the stage, I gave Heavenly Nostrils my number, and walked out with the Electrician. Once outside I said goodbye to Saucy who was leaving with the Pizza Boy, and the Electrician was on his cell phone getting a plan of action together for the after party. While he was on the phone and standing right next to me, the cutie with the Elvis glasses walked up and asked if I had the low down on the after gig. I said no, and he politely introduced himself to the Electrician. As soon as he walked away, the Latin guy walks up and begans asking me what my plans are for the rest of the night. He catches the Electrician's eye and sheepishly walks away. It was decided that we were just going to go back to his place since my feet were killing me (remember I'm wearing Saucy's boots and she wears about and 8 1/2 and I wear a 10), and he couldn't track down a location for the beach party. I would have been freezing anyway right? As we're walking to his truck I pass Nostrils and he grabs my free hand, looks at the Electician, and gives me one of those "I see how it is" looks. I pause long enough to tell him he should still call me and the Electrician is standing behind me mocking me, " call me, call me". So much for my furtive attempt. We walk away and the Electrician scoops me up and playfully threatens "You're asking for it". On the way to his place Heavenly Nostrils actually calls and asks what I was doing the rest of the night. I fibbed and said nothing and he said he would call me later. So we went to Electrician's apartment, he gave me the tour and the tour concluded in his bedroom. He wasn't amazing but he took direction very well. He's got a gorgeous body and the sparkliest blue eyes. The next morning we made small talk and he took me back to Saucy's. We agreed to call each other sometime although I feel like he's too young to pursue. I may call him the next time I'm in SC, he may call me when he's in the city, but I'm not terribly smitten.
Sunday I went to brunch and the beach with Saucy and she invited the film maker from the night before. He's really tall, incredibly built, super handsome, and intriguingly odd. He actually has a tattoo of Shemp of the three stooges on one arm, and a rubber duckie on the other. Saucy seemed to think he may have been more interested in me than her, but I didn't get that impression. She said if that became the case she'd encourage me to go for it so she could get the full report. Anything for the sake of research I say. While at the beach Heavenly Nostrils called and invited me to a party in Capitola. I accepted and said I would call him later to get directions. When I called I got his voice mail, so I layed down until he called back. A two hour cat nap later (I don't know why I was tired, I hadn't been up all night or anything) and I woke to him calling to say that his phone had turned off in his pocket but he wanted to see me before I left. I told him I was leaving in about 30 minutes, but he should give me a call the next time he's in the city. He may or may not, but this one is definitely too young to pursue. When I got back to work on Monday, I emailed a friend and asked him to pass along my number to his friend who I met while out dancing last week, as if I need anymore male preoccupation. He said his friend talked about me all night long. When you're hot, you're hot.
When I started this crazy blog a year ago, my first entry was a recap of ladees nite, and a line up of male prospects. Good to see the important things haven't changed!
My favorite thing today: Relishing my footloose and fancy free days
Yeah, it was the moon, the moon made me do it! Was it me who just a week ago wrote that my life was nice and calm at the moment? The forecast has just called for flurries! My intention was just to celebrate a nice relaxing Summer Solstice weekend with the girls, honestly! Friday and Saturday night, come home early Sunday on the 10am Caltrain. BUT-I ditched work on Friday (note to self: do not give co-workers blogspot url) and rode Caltrain down with my sweet friend OB1 on Thursday night and I didn't get home until midnight on Sunday. Thursday we stayed in Santa Clara with my friend Saucy who was house sitting. We had a nice evening of gab, walked the dog, and helped Saucy get her Solstice gifts in order. She had gotten her close friends a nice Cala Lilly and handmade cards. We got up at 5am, and left these trinkets of joy on everyone's doorstep, just like little Solstice fairies. While out on our sunrise mission, there was a guy driving next to us who nearly broke his neck trying to get a closer look at 3 girls in a car. When we approached the next stop light, he moved over in the opposite lane and put his passenger window down. We stayed about 2 car lengths behind. The freaks don't just come out at night my friends.
Friday Saucy had to work so OB1 and I headed downtown for a little brunch, a little consignment shop shopping, and a nice rest in the park. Later for dinner Saucy introduced us to Charlie Hong Kong's. Not exactly traditional Asian dishes, but dirt cheap and bowl cleaning tasty. We wound up taking it easy that night and rented Ocean's Eleven which is a 90 minute non-stop visual treat for women.
Saturday a group of us went to Walnut Avenue for my favorite eggs benedict in the world, the Blackened Ahi Benedict. Scrumdiliocous. Saturday OB1 went home early because she felt like she was catching a cold. After brunch the rest of us girls went to the beach. Saucy, her roommate, Saucy's friend and me. Saucy's friends the Electrician and Weasel stopped by, the Electrician is devastatingly handsome, very Kennedyesque. Along came Super Booty Boy. Not just because he has one, but he's in the band! They're an ultra-fun 70's cover band. He's a really nice guy too, Saucy dated him a while back, but now they're friends. So he invites us to the show that night, puts us on the list, and now the girls have plans to go out dancing! I popped downtown to pick up a Super Booty worthy mini dress and borrowed Saucy's knee high black boots, I felt saucy myself. Saucy wore this outstanding clingy white satin jumpsuit with an exposed mid-driff, she was hot stuff! We had a blast getting ready, listening to dance music and drinking beer. The apartment looked like a war zone as we bolted out the door. Four fabulous girls headed out together, but we didn't wind up going home together, some of us didn't go home at all!
We went to the club and bought ourselves a beer and began chatting away with everyone around us. A guy at the bar bought me my second beer so I made small talk with him and his friend. They get up to the city a lot, but the type of clubs thy named told me they were cheeseballs. Mid conversation I looked over and recognized the Electrician from the beach earlier. Left the two guys at the bar like an ungrateful wench, and took the Electrician by the arm. "Well hello blue eyes" I greeted him. He was wearing a funky afro wig, and groovy shirt, I like a guy who gets into character. Saucy had already been chatting up some buff guy and a guy who said he was just waking up. I went upstairs to partake in a sweet clove cigarette (my first one in AGES) where I engaged in small talk with a cutie pie with Elvis sunglasses, and caught eyes with even cuter cutie pie with the hottest nostrils going. Everyone already knows about my nose fetish right? I'm walking downstairs to get back to dancing with my girls and I'm approached by a pretty Latin boy who's name I can't remember. He grabbed my hand as we pushed through the crowd towards the stage, but as I bumped into the Electrician, I let go of Latin man's hand. Am I bad or what? I'd chat with one boy while waiting for the bathroom, another while dancing, another while walking from the powder room to the dance floor, I was dizzy, I felt like a pinball. I could barely keep them straight. Saucy had several plates of her own spinning during the evening. In addition to the two from earlier she'd added a 6' 4" film maker, and Pizza Boy, a guy she's been dating for a couple of weeks showed up as well. THEN Super Booty boy decided to confess his sappy feeling to her, like I said before, the moon was in full effect.
As the band left the stage, I gave Heavenly Nostrils my number, and walked out with the Electrician. Once outside I said goodbye to Saucy who was leaving with the Pizza Boy, and the Electrician was on his cell phone getting a plan of action together for the after party. While he was on the phone and standing right next to me, the cutie with the Elvis glasses walked up and asked if I had the low down on the after gig. I said no, and he politely introduced himself to the Electrician. As soon as he walked away, the Latin guy walks up and begans asking me what my plans are for the rest of the night. He catches the Electrician's eye and sheepishly walks away. It was decided that we were just going to go back to his place since my feet were killing me (remember I'm wearing Saucy's boots and she wears about and 8 1/2 and I wear a 10), and he couldn't track down a location for the beach party. I would have been freezing anyway right? As we're walking to his truck I pass Nostrils and he grabs my free hand, looks at the Electician, and gives me one of those "I see how it is" looks. I pause long enough to tell him he should still call me and the Electrician is standing behind me mocking me, " call me, call me". So much for my furtive attempt. We walk away and the Electrician scoops me up and playfully threatens "You're asking for it". On the way to his place Heavenly Nostrils actually calls and asks what I was doing the rest of the night. I fibbed and said nothing and he said he would call me later. So we went to Electrician's apartment, he gave me the tour and the tour concluded in his bedroom. He wasn't amazing but he took direction very well. He's got a gorgeous body and the sparkliest blue eyes. The next morning we made small talk and he took me back to Saucy's. We agreed to call each other sometime although I feel like he's too young to pursue. I may call him the next time I'm in SC, he may call me when he's in the city, but I'm not terribly smitten.
Sunday I went to brunch and the beach with Saucy and she invited the film maker from the night before. He's really tall, incredibly built, super handsome, and intriguingly odd. He actually has a tattoo of Shemp of the three stooges on one arm, and a rubber duckie on the other. Saucy seemed to think he may have been more interested in me than her, but I didn't get that impression. She said if that became the case she'd encourage me to go for it so she could get the full report. Anything for the sake of research I say. While at the beach Heavenly Nostrils called and invited me to a party in Capitola. I accepted and said I would call him later to get directions. When I called I got his voice mail, so I layed down until he called back. A two hour cat nap later (I don't know why I was tired, I hadn't been up all night or anything) and I woke to him calling to say that his phone had turned off in his pocket but he wanted to see me before I left. I told him I was leaving in about 30 minutes, but he should give me a call the next time he's in the city. He may or may not, but this one is definitely too young to pursue. When I got back to work on Monday, I emailed a friend and asked him to pass along my number to his friend who I met while out dancing last week, as if I need anymore male preoccupation. He said his friend talked about me all night long. When you're hot, you're hot.
When I started this crazy blog a year ago, my first entry was a recap of ladees nite, and a line up of male prospects. Good to see the important things haven't changed!
My favorite thing today: Relishing my footloose and fancy free days
A Disgrace to Dance Music
Last night as I was doing the dishes I turned on 92.7fm, the new all dance radio station. Someone has actually mixed a dance version of The Price Is Right game show theme song. I wiggled slightly just for nostalgia sake, and then very quicky became very very sick of it. What is this world coming to?
Last night as I was doing the dishes I turned on 92.7fm, the new all dance radio station. Someone has actually mixed a dance version of The Price Is Right game show theme song. I wiggled slightly just for nostalgia sake, and then very quicky became very very sick of it. What is this world coming to?
June 20, 2002
Perfect Timing
The other day I had a "challenging" day at work. After I left the den of oppression I went to my favorite ass shakin' venue and shook it for about 3 hours with some friends from my old job. It was great to be among super comfortable company. One friend is a cute Jersey Boy. He's always had a girlfriend. Then they broke up and I had a boyfriend. Now we're both single. He's not someone I would date, but we like each other and there's always been chemistry. He's moving to the East Coast on Monday. I haven't had hubba-hubba in over 2 months. He came home with me. Yay for me.
My favorite thing today:Taking advantage of a situation for what it is.
The other day I had a "challenging" day at work. After I left the den of oppression I went to my favorite ass shakin' venue and shook it for about 3 hours with some friends from my old job. It was great to be among super comfortable company. One friend is a cute Jersey Boy. He's always had a girlfriend. Then they broke up and I had a boyfriend. Now we're both single. He's not someone I would date, but we like each other and there's always been chemistry. He's moving to the East Coast on Monday. I haven't had hubba-hubba in over 2 months. He came home with me. Yay for me.
My favorite thing today:Taking advantage of a situation for what it is.
June 18, 2002
In Mixed Company
Last night I attended a dinner party of 4 straight women, 2 straight males, 2 gay males, and a lesbian. We enjoyed a savory ginger carrot soup, yummy roasted garlic on bread, a lovely salad, and sweet beer. We talked politics, religion, entertainment, and sex. There was only one person out of all of us in a relationship, boy did we talk about sex. I found out that the last car on BART is known as a gay anonymous sex scene. Most agreed that it's hard to find really skinny boys attractive. One girl said that although she has a high appreciation for the female form, she does not appreciate one on a man. One girl had a long-term with a really thin guy, like 12 year-old boy skinny. He never gained weight the whole time they were together. He worked as an IT guy, so we joked that she should have put food on his keyboard so he would have had to lick his fingers and then maybe he would have gained weight. Another girl suggested she could have asked him to lift a gallon of milk; 75 times! I admitted that I like my men a little round. I certainly date all shapes and sizes, I go for personality first. The others aren't thrilled with big boys. "Bitch tits don't do it for us" they said. I actually have a fascination with over-sized things, maybe it's just an extension of that. It takes all kinds.
My favorite thing today:Cultural diversity
Last night I attended a dinner party of 4 straight women, 2 straight males, 2 gay males, and a lesbian. We enjoyed a savory ginger carrot soup, yummy roasted garlic on bread, a lovely salad, and sweet beer. We talked politics, religion, entertainment, and sex. There was only one person out of all of us in a relationship, boy did we talk about sex. I found out that the last car on BART is known as a gay anonymous sex scene. Most agreed that it's hard to find really skinny boys attractive. One girl said that although she has a high appreciation for the female form, she does not appreciate one on a man. One girl had a long-term with a really thin guy, like 12 year-old boy skinny. He never gained weight the whole time they were together. He worked as an IT guy, so we joked that she should have put food on his keyboard so he would have had to lick his fingers and then maybe he would have gained weight. Another girl suggested she could have asked him to lift a gallon of milk; 75 times! I admitted that I like my men a little round. I certainly date all shapes and sizes, I go for personality first. The others aren't thrilled with big boys. "Bitch tits don't do it for us" they said. I actually have a fascination with over-sized things, maybe it's just an extension of that. It takes all kinds.
My favorite thing today:Cultural diversity
June 17, 2002
Someone Else's Drama
My life’s events are at a very still point right now. In the past this made me uncomfortable. I’d get bored and wait impatiently for something to happen, for the next step. I know myself well enough to know that I enjoy the thrill of a little chaos, but I’ve grown to appreciate and cherrish down time. I believe it was my anxiousness that would actually create un-necessary drama, and when I have drama, it’s odd enough on it’s own without adding my mental fuel. This is a great time to focus outward. We spend so much of our time self absorbed, really believing that our issues are worth boo-hooing about. Looking at the big picture make some feel almost ashamed sometimes that I have the nerve to consider myself lacking in some aspect of my life. Probably not a revelation for most, but it’s what’s been going through my mind this morning so I had to get it out. So last night I got to hear a tale of someone else’s chaos. Understand I don’t get any joy from other’s confusion or pain, but I love a juicy romantic situation just as much as the next girl. Okay, a friend has had this boyfriend for a year and a half now. Totally into each other, super solid. My friend is 33, her beau is 25. A couple of months ago he decides that he wants to travel around the states on his motorcycle, find himself. She loves him and will miss him, but knows he's gotta do what he's gotta do. So he's been gone a month now, they talk every few days, and she's confident that in time they'll be together again. Then this weekend, a certain guy who she used to work with and had a secret crush on for about eight years, but who had a girlfriend the whole time so he was off limits, is now single and visiting SF. Uh-huh, she thinks the universe may be trying to tell her something. She was actually meeting with her current beau's mother for dinner last night, but was going to drop in on the visting guy before hand to welcome him to the city. We thought for sure she was going to cancel the dinner and get some hubba hubba, but alas, she made the dinner on time, and announced today that she is steadfast going to wait for her soul searching beau. Oh well, she gave us one night of intrigue!
My life’s events are at a very still point right now. In the past this made me uncomfortable. I’d get bored and wait impatiently for something to happen, for the next step. I know myself well enough to know that I enjoy the thrill of a little chaos, but I’ve grown to appreciate and cherrish down time. I believe it was my anxiousness that would actually create un-necessary drama, and when I have drama, it’s odd enough on it’s own without adding my mental fuel. This is a great time to focus outward. We spend so much of our time self absorbed, really believing that our issues are worth boo-hooing about. Looking at the big picture make some feel almost ashamed sometimes that I have the nerve to consider myself lacking in some aspect of my life. Probably not a revelation for most, but it’s what’s been going through my mind this morning so I had to get it out. So last night I got to hear a tale of someone else’s chaos. Understand I don’t get any joy from other’s confusion or pain, but I love a juicy romantic situation just as much as the next girl. Okay, a friend has had this boyfriend for a year and a half now. Totally into each other, super solid. My friend is 33, her beau is 25. A couple of months ago he decides that he wants to travel around the states on his motorcycle, find himself. She loves him and will miss him, but knows he's gotta do what he's gotta do. So he's been gone a month now, they talk every few days, and she's confident that in time they'll be together again. Then this weekend, a certain guy who she used to work with and had a secret crush on for about eight years, but who had a girlfriend the whole time so he was off limits, is now single and visiting SF. Uh-huh, she thinks the universe may be trying to tell her something. She was actually meeting with her current beau's mother for dinner last night, but was going to drop in on the visting guy before hand to welcome him to the city. We thought for sure she was going to cancel the dinner and get some hubba hubba, but alas, she made the dinner on time, and announced today that she is steadfast going to wait for her soul searching beau. Oh well, she gave us one night of intrigue!
Visual Treat
I just had the most adorable bike messenger pick up a package for us here at the firm. Turns out I met him about a year ago. He’s an ex of a friend of a friend, and I don't talk to either friend anymore so I think he’s fair play right? And I won’t even hold it against him that he is yet another man who shares the same name as a recent interlude. Q-T-Pie!
I just had the most adorable bike messenger pick up a package for us here at the firm. Turns out I met him about a year ago. He’s an ex of a friend of a friend, and I don't talk to either friend anymore so I think he’s fair play right? And I won’t even hold it against him that he is yet another man who shares the same name as a recent interlude. Q-T-Pie!
June 16, 2002
Surreal
Last night I went to the DNA Lounge with a friend who just completed her Masters in Archeology, and needed to blow off some steam. I hadn't been dancing in ages, but I managed to wiggle for 4 hours non-stop. The party was put on by looq, the same group who hosts qool every Wed. at 111 Minna. Anita Lofton spun and man is she right on! I ran into a handful of people that I used to see every Wed, and had an outstanding time. So there I am with my eyes closed, moving how I do, when I hear a familiar bass line sneaking into a track. I flip through my mental cd collection and I can't place which cd it's on. Then it hits me; it's a song by my close friend's group Andain! That's my friend's voice I'm hearing in a club, watching people love the shit out of it! I knew it would happen one day, we make comments about it all the time, but I didn't realize it would be so soon, I was so proud. Let me know if anyone wants a demo cd of theirs, they're truly brilliant.
Last night I went to the DNA Lounge with a friend who just completed her Masters in Archeology, and needed to blow off some steam. I hadn't been dancing in ages, but I managed to wiggle for 4 hours non-stop. The party was put on by looq, the same group who hosts qool every Wed. at 111 Minna. Anita Lofton spun and man is she right on! I ran into a handful of people that I used to see every Wed, and had an outstanding time. So there I am with my eyes closed, moving how I do, when I hear a familiar bass line sneaking into a track. I flip through my mental cd collection and I can't place which cd it's on. Then it hits me; it's a song by my close friend's group Andain! That's my friend's voice I'm hearing in a club, watching people love the shit out of it! I knew it would happen one day, we make comments about it all the time, but I didn't realize it would be so soon, I was so proud. Let me know if anyone wants a demo cd of theirs, they're truly brilliant.
June 15, 2002
My Aunt is a Zombie From Hell
Creature Comforts. Jot this down and pick it up the next time you go to the video store or put it in your netflix queue, they have it, I looked. That is an order from your Queen! I watched it this morning for my Saturday Morning Cartoon fix. I gave myself a headache I laughed so hard!
Creature Comforts. Jot this down and pick it up the next time you go to the video store or put it in your netflix queue, they have it, I looked. That is an order from your Queen! I watched it this morning for my Saturday Morning Cartoon fix. I gave myself a headache I laughed so hard!
Misty Eyed
Last night around 10:00, I heard a loud thunder-like sound outside. I dismissed it as a large truck and went on watching The Terminator. Hey I've never seen it before, and I was cherishing a night in alone. A few seconds later I heard it again. And again. So I thought, either we're being attacked and those are cannons, or more likely, it's FIREWORKS!!!!! I raced to my roof deck in my pjs in record time, and was able to enjoy over 10 minutes of glowing eye candy. If you know me, you already know fireworks are my favorite thing EVER. Anything that glows really, but fireworks are nostalgic and captivating. The last thing that my family did together, my mom, dad, siblings and me, was celebrate the 4th of July. That was back in 1988. The next day my dad left for Korea for 3 years, and my parents were divorced by the time he came back. I remember my sister describing each blast as if she were a correspondent for the blind "Oh, a greeeeeen one", "Ooooo now a BIG bluuuuuue one". My parents were lovey dovey because my dad was going to be leaving the next day. It was warm and humid, and I grinned with every burst of color.
I love the unexpected.
Last night around 10:00, I heard a loud thunder-like sound outside. I dismissed it as a large truck and went on watching The Terminator. Hey I've never seen it before, and I was cherishing a night in alone. A few seconds later I heard it again. And again. So I thought, either we're being attacked and those are cannons, or more likely, it's FIREWORKS!!!!! I raced to my roof deck in my pjs in record time, and was able to enjoy over 10 minutes of glowing eye candy. If you know me, you already know fireworks are my favorite thing EVER. Anything that glows really, but fireworks are nostalgic and captivating. The last thing that my family did together, my mom, dad, siblings and me, was celebrate the 4th of July. That was back in 1988. The next day my dad left for Korea for 3 years, and my parents were divorced by the time he came back. I remember my sister describing each blast as if she were a correspondent for the blind "Oh, a greeeeeen one", "Ooooo now a BIG bluuuuuue one". My parents were lovey dovey because my dad was going to be leaving the next day. It was warm and humid, and I grinned with every burst of color.
I love the unexpected.
June 14, 2002
Dark Wonderland
I just read that they may be making a movie based on American McGee's Alice video game. Takes me back to the launch party for the game that I went to a couple of years ago. There were some amazingly creative costumes, mock turtles, mad hatters, tweedles, I was certainly in my element. That's your darling queen there dressed as her alter-ego. I wound up going on a date with the man of the hour about a week later. He was adorable, and he was funny, and he chose to go snort coke rather than continue his date with me. How was this even a decision to be made? Enjoy cute and spunky girl's company or engage in mindless chatter and get a nosebleed. Gee, let me think.
I just read that they may be making a movie based on American McGee's Alice video game. Takes me back to the launch party for the game that I went to a couple of years ago. There were some amazingly creative costumes, mock turtles, mad hatters, tweedles, I was certainly in my element. That's your darling queen there dressed as her alter-ego. I wound up going on a date with the man of the hour about a week later. He was adorable, and he was funny, and he chose to go snort coke rather than continue his date with me. How was this even a decision to be made? Enjoy cute and spunky girl's company or engage in mindless chatter and get a nosebleed. Gee, let me think.
June 13, 2002
Walt Was Right
No this isn't a duplicate posting, I just had yet another small world moment last night. I went to the grocery store with the ladees to get provisions for Ladees Night, you know wine, beer, cheesecake, the usual. And who is in line behind me but Indie Kid. I met Indie Kid in November of 2000 in L.A. I went down with a friend for the weekend and we stayed with Indie Kid, who is a friend of my friend, and his business partner. They own a small independent music promotion company in New York City. I was heartbroken over the Irish Lad, but I had a fun sweaty fling with Indie Kid and it was great because we lived on opposite coasts. A couple of weeks later I was in Illinois visiting family for Thanksgiving, and Indie Kid was driving cross country back to N.Y.C., so he dropped by on his way through and stayed the night. He's really funny and adorable, my family loved him. He wasn't the kind of guy I would have dated if we had lived in the same city, but much fun nonetheless. Then, a couple of weeks later he phoned and said he was going to be in SF and wanted to know if I wanted to go to a .com launch party at The Warfield where James Brown would be performing! He came into town and stayed with me the first night and the next night was the party. We went and had a wonderful time until I kept losing track of Indie Kid only to find him in a corner somewhere with this music industry chick. Now I know we weren't exactly devoted to each other, but we had just stayed at my house the night before having hubba hubba, and I assumed it would happen again. Anyway, we went to an after party and he ignored me the whole time, I left pissed off, it was ugly. He called me the next day on his way to the airport and apologized and said he wasn't hitting on the girl, that it was just business. Yeah, okay. We emailed for the next few weeks and then that was it. So last night he's in line behind me, with the very same girl afore mentioned from the party thank you very much, we made small talk. He now lives here in the city, at the same intersection that I work at. Am I magnet for this kind of thing or does this happen to everyone? If I were inerested in him I'd say it was a sign. Instead I think the universe it trying to tell me that 3/4 of a million people does not a big city make.
My favorite thing today: Not having to work on a weekday!
No this isn't a duplicate posting, I just had yet another small world moment last night. I went to the grocery store with the ladees to get provisions for Ladees Night, you know wine, beer, cheesecake, the usual. And who is in line behind me but Indie Kid. I met Indie Kid in November of 2000 in L.A. I went down with a friend for the weekend and we stayed with Indie Kid, who is a friend of my friend, and his business partner. They own a small independent music promotion company in New York City. I was heartbroken over the Irish Lad, but I had a fun sweaty fling with Indie Kid and it was great because we lived on opposite coasts. A couple of weeks later I was in Illinois visiting family for Thanksgiving, and Indie Kid was driving cross country back to N.Y.C., so he dropped by on his way through and stayed the night. He's really funny and adorable, my family loved him. He wasn't the kind of guy I would have dated if we had lived in the same city, but much fun nonetheless. Then, a couple of weeks later he phoned and said he was going to be in SF and wanted to know if I wanted to go to a .com launch party at The Warfield where James Brown would be performing! He came into town and stayed with me the first night and the next night was the party. We went and had a wonderful time until I kept losing track of Indie Kid only to find him in a corner somewhere with this music industry chick. Now I know we weren't exactly devoted to each other, but we had just stayed at my house the night before having hubba hubba, and I assumed it would happen again. Anyway, we went to an after party and he ignored me the whole time, I left pissed off, it was ugly. He called me the next day on his way to the airport and apologized and said he wasn't hitting on the girl, that it was just business. Yeah, okay. We emailed for the next few weeks and then that was it. So last night he's in line behind me, with the very same girl afore mentioned from the party thank you very much, we made small talk. He now lives here in the city, at the same intersection that I work at. Am I magnet for this kind of thing or does this happen to everyone? If I were inerested in him I'd say it was a sign. Instead I think the universe it trying to tell me that 3/4 of a million people does not a big city make.
My favorite thing today: Not having to work on a weekday!
June 12, 2002
First Year of Fog City Living Pt.2
1/00-5/00
Early February brought about the return of Big Head. We had passed each other on the street and then days later I received a thick envelope of writings by him inspired by me. We began emailing and before I knew it we were bed buddies again. Even though we were getting along much better this go 'round, we continued to see other people. In March I went to an art reception for a friend of a friend and was approached by a brilliant photographer for a photo shoot. I wound up with a close-up picture of myself that I actually really like. Late March I went to a friend's super fun Cowboys and Indians party where I met a dysfunctional Hungarian. Of course I didn't know he was screwed up in the beginning. He had a cute face, he was funny, very sure of himself, and said he had a great space I could use to throw a rave. It's an old National Guard Armory building that spans just about a whole square block. We originally started hanging out talking about the party, but soon we were smooching. I was still dating Big Head as well, but in May he wanted to make things exclusive and I didn't so we dramatically parted ways, declaring we would never speak to each other ever again! Soon after I discovered the Hungarian's dysfunctions. He was unreliable, dishonest, rude to strangers, and he had a girlfriend! Must have slipped his mind. That wraps up the most memorable events of the first 12 months. Year 2 coming soon to a blog near you.
1/00-5/00
Early February brought about the return of Big Head. We had passed each other on the street and then days later I received a thick envelope of writings by him inspired by me. We began emailing and before I knew it we were bed buddies again. Even though we were getting along much better this go 'round, we continued to see other people. In March I went to an art reception for a friend of a friend and was approached by a brilliant photographer for a photo shoot. I wound up with a close-up picture of myself that I actually really like. Late March I went to a friend's super fun Cowboys and Indians party where I met a dysfunctional Hungarian. Of course I didn't know he was screwed up in the beginning. He had a cute face, he was funny, very sure of himself, and said he had a great space I could use to throw a rave. It's an old National Guard Armory building that spans just about a whole square block. We originally started hanging out talking about the party, but soon we were smooching. I was still dating Big Head as well, but in May he wanted to make things exclusive and I didn't so we dramatically parted ways, declaring we would never speak to each other ever again! Soon after I discovered the Hungarian's dysfunctions. He was unreliable, dishonest, rude to strangers, and he had a girlfriend! Must have slipped his mind. That wraps up the most memorable events of the first 12 months. Year 2 coming soon to a blog near you.
Walt Was Right
It really is a small world. 785,700 people in San Francisco and the other night I went on a date with a guy who lives in the very same building as my friend Chatty. My dearest friend of 16 years with whom I lived with for over 2 years until 4 months ago. 6 degrees my friend. When I was living in my first flat here in the city, a guy moved in directly 2 floors above me who went to high school about 10 minutes from where I went to high school in VA. So how was the date you ask? Zero attraction, but a potential friend.
My favorite thing today: Raspberry honey covered almonds, mmmmm.
It really is a small world. 785,700 people in San Francisco and the other night I went on a date with a guy who lives in the very same building as my friend Chatty. My dearest friend of 16 years with whom I lived with for over 2 years until 4 months ago. 6 degrees my friend. When I was living in my first flat here in the city, a guy moved in directly 2 floors above me who went to high school about 10 minutes from where I went to high school in VA. So how was the date you ask? Zero attraction, but a potential friend.
My favorite thing today: Raspberry honey covered almonds, mmmmm.
June 10, 2002
Back in the Land of the Eating
So yesterday was the last day of The Fast, I drank yummy fresh squeezed orange juice and ate a tangy, sweet, juicy kiwi fruit. The flavors are hitting the tip of my tongue with full force, I love it. My wonderful neighbor and I made a pot of homemade vegetable soup last night, yes you're reading the right blog, I just want to be good to my body. The soup turned out absolutely delicious, I get to get some for dinner tonight. I was so excited while making the soup, I was talking to the vegetables. When I put the soup in the container for the fridge, I leaned in and whispered "Good night sweet prince". I was giddy over soup. Little things amuse little minds my friends.
That F***ing Disclaimer
My saucy friend from Santa Cruz came to stay with me on Saturday. She was recently dumped by a guy she had been seeing for a few months. When they first met he made the infamous remark "I'm not looking for anything serious". She took note, and the 'getting to know' you began. After 3 months of hanging out about 4 times a week, having sex, going camping at Joshua Tree, countless tender moments, many romantic gestures, and meeting his mother, my friend pretty much forgot the dooming comment, and felt confident that her feelings were reciprocated. Now my friend is an amazing, amazing woman. She's independent, going to school to be a nurse (how noble), has no emotional baggage, is communicative, super funny, down right sexy, and knows what she wants. She put herself out there and told him she'd like things to go to the next level and wanted to know his thoughts. He matter of factly reminded her that he told her in the beginning he didn't want anything serious, began ignoring her, and eventually just stopped making any kind of contact. This infuriates me. How someone can tell you when they first meet you that over time they're still not going to want anything more is beyond me. Do they have a crystal ball? I don't blame people for eventually losing interest. I'm not saying that I don't understand how after months of hanging out, someone could decide that they don't want it to go further, but couldn't a default statement in the beginning be "Whatever will be will be"? Couldn't we just agree from the get go that we'll see how things go? It's like people (men as well as women use this copout so don't think this is male bashing), want to hang on to this disclaimer statement, so they set the course of things by making this ridiculous statement. Are people that cowardly, that they can't just admit after a few month that it's just not working out? Sure you don't want to be the bad guy, it's never nice hurting someone's feelings, and it's awkward getting the words out, but do it on the phone if you have to, just don't make someone feel like you're completely enveloped in them, all the while thinking if they approach you about a possible commitment, you've got you're 'get out of a relationship free' card, and they knew better, didn't you read the fine print? I'm not bitter. I go into my relationship interludes with a clean slate. I don't punish anyone for other's mistakes. But I have seen this happen all too often, and it's time we started putting ourselves out there and being honest. I consoled my friend and I hope that she gets some closure from this guy. She'll have no problem finding other men who are interested, but I understand her frustration of feeling like she misread someone. You start to question your own judgement. Well don't doubt yourself my good friend, you just happened along a bad egg. Can't we all just get along?
qr
My favorite thing today:Raspberries, cantaloupe, and grapes.
So yesterday was the last day of The Fast, I drank yummy fresh squeezed orange juice and ate a tangy, sweet, juicy kiwi fruit. The flavors are hitting the tip of my tongue with full force, I love it. My wonderful neighbor and I made a pot of homemade vegetable soup last night, yes you're reading the right blog, I just want to be good to my body. The soup turned out absolutely delicious, I get to get some for dinner tonight. I was so excited while making the soup, I was talking to the vegetables. When I put the soup in the container for the fridge, I leaned in and whispered "Good night sweet prince". I was giddy over soup. Little things amuse little minds my friends.
That F***ing Disclaimer
My saucy friend from Santa Cruz came to stay with me on Saturday. She was recently dumped by a guy she had been seeing for a few months. When they first met he made the infamous remark "I'm not looking for anything serious". She took note, and the 'getting to know' you began. After 3 months of hanging out about 4 times a week, having sex, going camping at Joshua Tree, countless tender moments, many romantic gestures, and meeting his mother, my friend pretty much forgot the dooming comment, and felt confident that her feelings were reciprocated. Now my friend is an amazing, amazing woman. She's independent, going to school to be a nurse (how noble), has no emotional baggage, is communicative, super funny, down right sexy, and knows what she wants. She put herself out there and told him she'd like things to go to the next level and wanted to know his thoughts. He matter of factly reminded her that he told her in the beginning he didn't want anything serious, began ignoring her, and eventually just stopped making any kind of contact. This infuriates me. How someone can tell you when they first meet you that over time they're still not going to want anything more is beyond me. Do they have a crystal ball? I don't blame people for eventually losing interest. I'm not saying that I don't understand how after months of hanging out, someone could decide that they don't want it to go further, but couldn't a default statement in the beginning be "Whatever will be will be"? Couldn't we just agree from the get go that we'll see how things go? It's like people (men as well as women use this copout so don't think this is male bashing), want to hang on to this disclaimer statement, so they set the course of things by making this ridiculous statement. Are people that cowardly, that they can't just admit after a few month that it's just not working out? Sure you don't want to be the bad guy, it's never nice hurting someone's feelings, and it's awkward getting the words out, but do it on the phone if you have to, just don't make someone feel like you're completely enveloped in them, all the while thinking if they approach you about a possible commitment, you've got you're 'get out of a relationship free' card, and they knew better, didn't you read the fine print? I'm not bitter. I go into my relationship interludes with a clean slate. I don't punish anyone for other's mistakes. But I have seen this happen all too often, and it's time we started putting ourselves out there and being honest. I consoled my friend and I hope that she gets some closure from this guy. She'll have no problem finding other men who are interested, but I understand her frustration of feeling like she misread someone. You start to question your own judgement. Well don't doubt yourself my good friend, you just happened along a bad egg. Can't we all just get along?
qr
My favorite thing today:Raspberries, cantaloupe, and grapes.
June 06, 2002
Of Course It Is
That's been my response a lot lately when hearing a certain man's name. I just stopped dating someone who is the first person I've ever known with this particular name. Not a highly unusual name, just not so common. I had heard it probably twice in my life. Since the split less than a week ago, I've discovered the nice cashier at Trader Joe's has the same name. A friend's boyfriend has the same name. The customer support rep. for our scanner at work has the same name. The courier for our printing company has the same name. The style of chair that I received a purchase order for has the same name. The fabric that's going to hang in the master bedroom of one of our projects has the same name. The wine that I was instructed to pick up for a client has the same name.
That's been my response a lot lately when hearing a certain man's name. I just stopped dating someone who is the first person I've ever known with this particular name. Not a highly unusual name, just not so common. I had heard it probably twice in my life. Since the split less than a week ago, I've discovered the nice cashier at Trader Joe's has the same name. A friend's boyfriend has the same name. The customer support rep. for our scanner at work has the same name. The courier for our printing company has the same name. The style of chair that I received a purchase order for has the same name. The fabric that's going to hang in the master bedroom of one of our projects has the same name. The wine that I was instructed to pick up for a client has the same name.
June 05, 2002
The First Year Of Fog City Living Pt. 1
5/99-1/00
So I moved into a flat with my dearest friend of 13 years on Jones and Sutter. She had lived in SF for about 3 years already and was going to the Academy of Art. I was completely enamored with the city. I began working for a commercial real estate firm where my office was a gray maze, but the paycheck was fat which was necessary with my rent being as much most people's mortgage back home. There were a handful of great people at the office, and I met people through my roommate Chatty. Plus my friend Shlank Dogg from VA who came out for a week visit decided to stay. We became Three's Company. I immediately immersed my self in the rave scene. Coming from smalltown USA, I liked dance music, but all I knew was mainstream. After a few months here I was familiar with local djs, international djs, I knew all the different sub-categories of trance, techno, and house. I was dancing about 4 or 5 nights a week, and rolling entirely too much. But I'm a creature of extremes, and I came here with the intention on losing my mind and taking responsibility for no one but myself for the first time in my life. I was dating The Freaky Jehovah whom I had met during an earlier visit to SF a months before. He was handsome, and funny, and we only dated for about 6 or 7 weeks because he thought I worked for the devil because I was a witch. I tried to educate him, but I couldn't tolerate his ignorance or his constant sermons. I went on a date with a man I thought was gay. I didn't know it was a date, I thought he was gay. I had met him at a party and I thought that I remembered hearing him in conversation say something about his boyfriend. Between meeting so many new people and rolling my ass off, I got him mixed up with someone else. So we went out one night, me thinking I'm hanging out with my new gay buddy, him wanting to score. He walked me home and asked if he could kiss me goodnight. My face contorted as I blurted out "I thought you were gay"?! He was offended, thinking he was acting feminine. After I re-boosted his ego and explained my confusion, peace was made. We tried hangin out again, but I wasn't interested, he was, it didn't work.
In early June I met Big Head. Both figuratively and literally. He was funny, he was romantic, he was well read, he was cute, he was (and still is) the greatest fuck of my life, and he also thought. A LOT. I'm always up for a good gabfest, but this man took philosophizing to an extreme level. We hung out for 4 months but it was a constant battle of egos. It created great drama for passionate sex, but I became irritated.
In August I participated in my first Folsom Street Fair, which was needless to say, and eye opening event. Chatty and I went topless with neat design painted on. I certainly saw aspects of S&M that I never dreamed existed. People in my office thought I was a freak for going, but we looked tame in comparison to the other "Fair Goers". October 31st I enjoyed my first San Francisco Castro Halloween. I was blown away. 250,000 people not only dressed in character, but who were their character. I rented my costume from Costumes on Haight (who now know me by name) and I was a duchess. Chatty and I had to tape my boobs together for the proper Victorian effect (cleavage brought to you by 3M), and I had this 2 foot high powdered wig that kept falling backwards, but so well worth it. In November I sat in as an extra for the film The Sculptress. It was only 2 days, but I hung out with fun people, got fed, have a story to tell, and made a date with the craft services boy. He was really funny, a real kid at heart. We hung out for 2 months, but I couldn't bring myself to kiss him because when I tried he gave me that brotherly vibe, eeewwww.
The December holiday brought about the first annual Little Orphan Christmas. There were so many young adults we knew who had no family here in the city, but wanted some form of a traditional Christmas day. So we gathered, and bought each other toys, made gourmet food, drank, smoked, and played. A week later I witnessed the turn of the century, a once in a life time event. In January I went to VA to visit my family and it confirmed I had made the right choice in moving far, far, away. My luggage was lost, I was stuck in my mother's mobile home during a blizzard, and I felt out of place.
My favorite thing today: It actually feeling like a real summer day in Fog City.
5/99-1/00
So I moved into a flat with my dearest friend of 13 years on Jones and Sutter. She had lived in SF for about 3 years already and was going to the Academy of Art. I was completely enamored with the city. I began working for a commercial real estate firm where my office was a gray maze, but the paycheck was fat which was necessary with my rent being as much most people's mortgage back home. There were a handful of great people at the office, and I met people through my roommate Chatty. Plus my friend Shlank Dogg from VA who came out for a week visit decided to stay. We became Three's Company. I immediately immersed my self in the rave scene. Coming from smalltown USA, I liked dance music, but all I knew was mainstream. After a few months here I was familiar with local djs, international djs, I knew all the different sub-categories of trance, techno, and house. I was dancing about 4 or 5 nights a week, and rolling entirely too much. But I'm a creature of extremes, and I came here with the intention on losing my mind and taking responsibility for no one but myself for the first time in my life. I was dating The Freaky Jehovah whom I had met during an earlier visit to SF a months before. He was handsome, and funny, and we only dated for about 6 or 7 weeks because he thought I worked for the devil because I was a witch. I tried to educate him, but I couldn't tolerate his ignorance or his constant sermons. I went on a date with a man I thought was gay. I didn't know it was a date, I thought he was gay. I had met him at a party and I thought that I remembered hearing him in conversation say something about his boyfriend. Between meeting so many new people and rolling my ass off, I got him mixed up with someone else. So we went out one night, me thinking I'm hanging out with my new gay buddy, him wanting to score. He walked me home and asked if he could kiss me goodnight. My face contorted as I blurted out "I thought you were gay"?! He was offended, thinking he was acting feminine. After I re-boosted his ego and explained my confusion, peace was made. We tried hangin out again, but I wasn't interested, he was, it didn't work.
In early June I met Big Head. Both figuratively and literally. He was funny, he was romantic, he was well read, he was cute, he was (and still is) the greatest fuck of my life, and he also thought. A LOT. I'm always up for a good gabfest, but this man took philosophizing to an extreme level. We hung out for 4 months but it was a constant battle of egos. It created great drama for passionate sex, but I became irritated.
In August I participated in my first Folsom Street Fair, which was needless to say, and eye opening event. Chatty and I went topless with neat design painted on. I certainly saw aspects of S&M that I never dreamed existed. People in my office thought I was a freak for going, but we looked tame in comparison to the other "Fair Goers". October 31st I enjoyed my first San Francisco Castro Halloween. I was blown away. 250,000 people not only dressed in character, but who were their character. I rented my costume from Costumes on Haight (who now know me by name) and I was a duchess. Chatty and I had to tape my boobs together for the proper Victorian effect (cleavage brought to you by 3M), and I had this 2 foot high powdered wig that kept falling backwards, but so well worth it. In November I sat in as an extra for the film The Sculptress. It was only 2 days, but I hung out with fun people, got fed, have a story to tell, and made a date with the craft services boy. He was really funny, a real kid at heart. We hung out for 2 months, but I couldn't bring myself to kiss him because when I tried he gave me that brotherly vibe, eeewwww.
The December holiday brought about the first annual Little Orphan Christmas. There were so many young adults we knew who had no family here in the city, but wanted some form of a traditional Christmas day. So we gathered, and bought each other toys, made gourmet food, drank, smoked, and played. A week later I witnessed the turn of the century, a once in a life time event. In January I went to VA to visit my family and it confirmed I had made the right choice in moving far, far, away. My luggage was lost, I was stuck in my mother's mobile home during a blizzard, and I felt out of place.
My favorite thing today: It actually feeling like a real summer day in Fog City.
June 04, 2002
Running Out Of Steam
I've been laying low lately so I'm afraid there's not a whole lot to report today. Day 2 of The Fast so my energy level is rock bottom and I am abnormally mellow. Apparently after the 3rd day food is out of your mind. I'll belive it when I see it. I think the planetary alignment is back to normal so there is zero drama in my life again, at last. I started one of my new jobs yesterday, it seems nice and chill, it's 3 days a week there and 2 days at another that I start next week so it's variety. Someone please send food to my house. No don't. I can be strong. Okay, yeah, I want pad thai, cashew prawns, a pizza with extra cheese.... NO don't. This will all be worth it. For the love of GOD what are you waiting for? Make the call! So earlier today I had to call Hewlett Packard because our scanner quit working, and the rep. had to put me on hold. Well the person he called to get the info I needed accidentally put all 3 of us on conference so I could hear their conversation. He didn't say anything that I thought was incriminating, he told the other rep. that I was being patient and he thought I sounded cute. When he clicked back over and realized what he'd done, he said everyone was looking at him because he was beet red. Then he couldn't get the muzak to stop while we were trying to figure shipping info, and I told him it sounded like we were in an elevator together. Just then a saucy little sax number came on and we both just cracked up. "Hey baby", I cooed. "You're listening to smoooooth jazz". He chuckled and said it felt like a Pulp Fiction moment. Too silly.
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My favorite thing today: Having a friend who's enduring the fast as well. Wait a minute. This was her idea and I'm suffering, what gives?
I've been laying low lately so I'm afraid there's not a whole lot to report today. Day 2 of The Fast so my energy level is rock bottom and I am abnormally mellow. Apparently after the 3rd day food is out of your mind. I'll belive it when I see it. I think the planetary alignment is back to normal so there is zero drama in my life again, at last. I started one of my new jobs yesterday, it seems nice and chill, it's 3 days a week there and 2 days at another that I start next week so it's variety. Someone please send food to my house. No don't. I can be strong. Okay, yeah, I want pad thai, cashew prawns, a pizza with extra cheese.... NO don't. This will all be worth it. For the love of GOD what are you waiting for? Make the call! So earlier today I had to call Hewlett Packard because our scanner quit working, and the rep. had to put me on hold. Well the person he called to get the info I needed accidentally put all 3 of us on conference so I could hear their conversation. He didn't say anything that I thought was incriminating, he told the other rep. that I was being patient and he thought I sounded cute. When he clicked back over and realized what he'd done, he said everyone was looking at him because he was beet red. Then he couldn't get the muzak to stop while we were trying to figure shipping info, and I told him it sounded like we were in an elevator together. Just then a saucy little sax number came on and we both just cracked up. "Hey baby", I cooed. "You're listening to smoooooth jazz". He chuckled and said it felt like a Pulp Fiction moment. Too silly.
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My favorite thing today: Having a friend who's enduring the fast as well. Wait a minute. This was her idea and I'm suffering, what gives?
June 03, 2002
Here's the link to my Fasting Torture Blog. You may not want the updates on my colon blow meshing with my daily antics, so you can go peek over there, if you're brave!
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Bottoms up!
I must admit, last night was the first time I've ever clinked mugs of laxative tea with anyone. Cheers? Day one of The Master Cleanser. This is going to be a challenge. I have friends who call me Piglet because I eat so much. I have friends who carry snacks with them when they know we're going to hang out because I become super mega horrific bitch when my blood sugar drops. My friends don't even bother to ask if I'm hungry anymore if they're entertaining the idea of a bite to eat. It's a given, I can always pack a meal away. But I figure after 28 years of packing it in, it's probably time to take out the trash. I'll spare you the details, but I'll keep you posted on my quest for a clean slate.
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I must admit, last night was the first time I've ever clinked mugs of laxative tea with anyone. Cheers? Day one of The Master Cleanser. This is going to be a challenge. I have friends who call me Piglet because I eat so much. I have friends who carry snacks with them when they know we're going to hang out because I become super mega horrific bitch when my blood sugar drops. My friends don't even bother to ask if I'm hungry anymore if they're entertaining the idea of a bite to eat. It's a given, I can always pack a meal away. But I figure after 28 years of packing it in, it's probably time to take out the trash. I'll spare you the details, but I'll keep you posted on my quest for a clean slate.
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May 30, 2002
Synchronicity
A couple of weeks ago I noted 3 all too coincidental instances in one day. I observed 3 more just yesterday. I'm a magnet for the freaky I tell ya!
First day
1) Before I left the house that morning I was playing a Cure cd and the last song I heard was "Hot Hot Hot". I left the house on my way to brunch at the BitterRoot with friends, which isn't part of the oddity but is so worth mentioning, the eggs gravlox is stellar!, and I ran into 2 neighbors who were out getting food to make french toast with. The first words spoken to me by another human being were "Hot Hot Hot", by my friend Margot smiling and pointing at my sassy skirt.
2) I was riding a muni bus with Mr. Blogger and the girl sitting in the next seat over had Tiffany and Co. shopping bag. I commented that it's every girl's dream to get something in one of those little trademark blue bags. Immediately after I said it, another girl got on the bus and sat right next to the girl with the shopping bag. Mr. Blogger pointed out that she was reading Breakfast at Tiffany's!
3) Later Mr. Blogger and I were eating at 'Q', they aren't lying when they describe their cuisine as comfort food, and I was playing with the alphabet magnets that are on the wall. I put the first letter of both of our names on the wall behind us, staking our claim of the table. Shortly after a woman leaned over and asked if she could have one of the letters because her son needed it to spell his name. I gave her the letter of my dates name, and wouldn't you know it, a minute later Mr. Blogger points and says "Look what his name is", of course, they shared the same name.
Yesterday
1) I hopped into my friend's car who I carpool with everyday, and she asked what I did the night before. I told her that for the first time in several weeks, no exaggeration, I stayed home alone and watched a movie. "What movie"? she asked. "The Original Get Carter", I exclaimed. Her eyes widened and her jaw dropped. "What, do you love it, what's that face"? I asked. Low and behold she too had just watched the original Get Carter last night, for the first time. Weird.
2) I left the office yesterday afternoon to catch the 5:11 Caltrain home. I said goodbye to 2 co-workers that were having a meeting in the conference room and walked a block to the station with about 7 minutes to spare. After I had been on the train for about 20 minutes I dozed off. I thought I heard someone say my name and I assumed I was dreaming. I heard it again and opened my eyes to see one of the girls that I had just left at the office sitting in the seat right in front of me. I was thoroughly confused. Apparently she decided to go ahead and go home early since she had gone in early, and just made the same train.
3) In my voice acting class there was a girl who has the same birth name as I do, Lisa. Another girl has the name that Lisa morphed into before the name I use now stuck, and that's Risa. Then there's me, you know what I'm called now. It was like all the stages of the evolution in one room.
A couple of weeks ago I noted 3 all too coincidental instances in one day. I observed 3 more just yesterday. I'm a magnet for the freaky I tell ya!
First day
1) Before I left the house that morning I was playing a Cure cd and the last song I heard was "Hot Hot Hot". I left the house on my way to brunch at the BitterRoot with friends, which isn't part of the oddity but is so worth mentioning, the eggs gravlox is stellar!, and I ran into 2 neighbors who were out getting food to make french toast with. The first words spoken to me by another human being were "Hot Hot Hot", by my friend Margot smiling and pointing at my sassy skirt.
2) I was riding a muni bus with Mr. Blogger and the girl sitting in the next seat over had Tiffany and Co. shopping bag. I commented that it's every girl's dream to get something in one of those little trademark blue bags. Immediately after I said it, another girl got on the bus and sat right next to the girl with the shopping bag. Mr. Blogger pointed out that she was reading Breakfast at Tiffany's!
3) Later Mr. Blogger and I were eating at 'Q', they aren't lying when they describe their cuisine as comfort food, and I was playing with the alphabet magnets that are on the wall. I put the first letter of both of our names on the wall behind us, staking our claim of the table. Shortly after a woman leaned over and asked if she could have one of the letters because her son needed it to spell his name. I gave her the letter of my dates name, and wouldn't you know it, a minute later Mr. Blogger points and says "Look what his name is", of course, they shared the same name.
Yesterday
1) I hopped into my friend's car who I carpool with everyday, and she asked what I did the night before. I told her that for the first time in several weeks, no exaggeration, I stayed home alone and watched a movie. "What movie"? she asked. "The Original Get Carter", I exclaimed. Her eyes widened and her jaw dropped. "What, do you love it, what's that face"? I asked. Low and behold she too had just watched the original Get Carter last night, for the first time. Weird.
2) I left the office yesterday afternoon to catch the 5:11 Caltrain home. I said goodbye to 2 co-workers that were having a meeting in the conference room and walked a block to the station with about 7 minutes to spare. After I had been on the train for about 20 minutes I dozed off. I thought I heard someone say my name and I assumed I was dreaming. I heard it again and opened my eyes to see one of the girls that I had just left at the office sitting in the seat right in front of me. I was thoroughly confused. Apparently she decided to go ahead and go home early since she had gone in early, and just made the same train.
3) In my voice acting class there was a girl who has the same birth name as I do, Lisa. Another girl has the name that Lisa morphed into before the name I use now stuck, and that's Risa. Then there's me, you know what I'm called now. It was like all the stages of the evolution in one room.
Summer in San Francisco?
I had an incredible voice acting class last night. After recording my lively Toyota Corolla monologue, my teacher only had 2 suggestions for me, and said that she was being really picky because I was so good. I'm so proud. And then when I got home at 10:30pm, it was still very warm. I went up to my roof deck which has a phenomenal city view, and relished in the nostalgia of the last 3 fun filled years here in SF. I thought about all of the wonderfully true friends that I have, I felt excitement for starting 2 new jobs next week, and I felt satisfied that I am at long last exploring my creative talent. I couldn't help but feel like I wanted someone's company too. Warm nights are so romantic, and rare in the city. I wondered what Mr. Blogger was doing, since he's the most recent. Oh alright, since I really dug his company. I wondered if he was actually able to enjoy the evening considering he works so much. It's a real shame when you have to let go of such a good vibe. It's not often that you find a romantic interest that you click so well with ya know? Of course when someone just isn't into you it makes it a lot easier to move one. I'm glad that things ended clean after only a couple of months and that it's not terribly painful, but that doesn't discount how much I did like about him. At any rate, I hope the warm weather continues. It's good for my internal clock, helps me feel the turn of nature's wheel. Anything but partly cloudy and 60 degrees is refreshing in this little city.
My favorite thing today: Being told that my "handshake" has no doubt made the world a better place for those who've been fortunate enough to come into contact with it.
I had an incredible voice acting class last night. After recording my lively Toyota Corolla monologue, my teacher only had 2 suggestions for me, and said that she was being really picky because I was so good. I'm so proud. And then when I got home at 10:30pm, it was still very warm. I went up to my roof deck which has a phenomenal city view, and relished in the nostalgia of the last 3 fun filled years here in SF. I thought about all of the wonderfully true friends that I have, I felt excitement for starting 2 new jobs next week, and I felt satisfied that I am at long last exploring my creative talent. I couldn't help but feel like I wanted someone's company too. Warm nights are so romantic, and rare in the city. I wondered what Mr. Blogger was doing, since he's the most recent. Oh alright, since I really dug his company. I wondered if he was actually able to enjoy the evening considering he works so much. It's a real shame when you have to let go of such a good vibe. It's not often that you find a romantic interest that you click so well with ya know? Of course when someone just isn't into you it makes it a lot easier to move one. I'm glad that things ended clean after only a couple of months and that it's not terribly painful, but that doesn't discount how much I did like about him. At any rate, I hope the warm weather continues. It's good for my internal clock, helps me feel the turn of nature's wheel. Anything but partly cloudy and 60 degrees is refreshing in this little city.
My favorite thing today: Being told that my "handshake" has no doubt made the world a better place for those who've been fortunate enough to come into contact with it.
May 29, 2002
3 Is A Magic Number
Happy anniversary to me! I arrived in SF with all of my worldly possessions in a GMC Sierra extended cab just 1,095 short days ago. Things have been moving so fast that I didn't really take time to reflect after my first and second year, but I'm demonstrating some major staying power here, so three deserves a little recognition. I lived in my first flat in the city for two years and nine months which is the longest I've lived under one roof in over a decade. I'm going to recap each year at a time in my next few postings, but here are a few overall stats. Since May 29th, 1999 I have:
Filled 5 journals, spent approx $900 on Muni and Bart passes, spent approx $720 in cab fare, approx $180 in airport shuttle fees, read 52 books, bought 78 cds, sold 45 cds, ran approx 200 miles training for a marathon, and had 6 romantic interludes. This aspect warrants it's own retrospective post in itself. Stay tuned for each year in review!
My favorite thing today: The yummiest cream of mushroom soup on the planet.
Happy anniversary to me! I arrived in SF with all of my worldly possessions in a GMC Sierra extended cab just 1,095 short days ago. Things have been moving so fast that I didn't really take time to reflect after my first and second year, but I'm demonstrating some major staying power here, so three deserves a little recognition. I lived in my first flat in the city for two years and nine months which is the longest I've lived under one roof in over a decade. I'm going to recap each year at a time in my next few postings, but here are a few overall stats. Since May 29th, 1999 I have:
Filled 5 journals, spent approx $900 on Muni and Bart passes, spent approx $720 in cab fare, approx $180 in airport shuttle fees, read 52 books, bought 78 cds, sold 45 cds, ran approx 200 miles training for a marathon, and had 6 romantic interludes. This aspect warrants it's own retrospective post in itself. Stay tuned for each year in review!
My favorite thing today: The yummiest cream of mushroom soup on the planet.
May 25, 2002
My Better Half
I know women who say that they get so used to their husband's snoring. That after a while they can't sleep without it. This morning Little G actually ripped me from my sleep with his bed shaking nasal melody. How can this be? He only weighs ten pounds.
I spent three and a half hours at Kabuki Springs on Sunday. Before I went I read the pamphlet and thought "dry sauna, wet sauna, hot pool, cold pool. I should be done in about an hour or so". I overlooked the tea, the water with lemon and cucumbers, cucumber slices for the eyes, sea salt for the sauna, lounge chars, benches, Japanese showers, not to mention the overall vegetated state one succumbs to after continual pampering. Life is good.
California is full of Weirdos
Could I ever admit to anyone back in VA that I sat around with a group of friends while one of them thought of a name for the new orchid she was given as a birthday gift? Sounds perfectly normal to me.
My favorite thing today: Wet and salty kisses from 3 year-old surfers!
I know women who say that they get so used to their husband's snoring. That after a while they can't sleep without it. This morning Little G actually ripped me from my sleep with his bed shaking nasal melody. How can this be? He only weighs ten pounds.
I spent three and a half hours at Kabuki Springs on Sunday. Before I went I read the pamphlet and thought "dry sauna, wet sauna, hot pool, cold pool. I should be done in about an hour or so". I overlooked the tea, the water with lemon and cucumbers, cucumber slices for the eyes, sea salt for the sauna, lounge chars, benches, Japanese showers, not to mention the overall vegetated state one succumbs to after continual pampering. Life is good.
California is full of Weirdos
Could I ever admit to anyone back in VA that I sat around with a group of friends while one of them thought of a name for the new orchid she was given as a birthday gift? Sounds perfectly normal to me.
My favorite thing today: Wet and salty kisses from 3 year-old surfers!
May 24, 2002
Smooth Talkers
I get an email from a friend this morning titled "There's someone I'd like you to meet". I know my friend. I know I'm in for a good hearty chuckle. I remember the email that he sent just after I broke up with The Brit entitled "You should call this guy". I was also looking for a job at the time and the link was from Craigslist so naturally I assumed my good friend had seen a career opportunity for me. Yep. You guessed it. The Brit was down with the tea, but not with going down on the crumpet. I saw that! That's the same face everyone made when I finally revealed my silent pain. I've considered about replying to either for more material. I love my friend for keeping me distracted while I lick my wounds.
I get an email from a friend this morning titled "There's someone I'd like you to meet". I know my friend. I know I'm in for a good hearty chuckle. I remember the email that he sent just after I broke up with The Brit entitled "You should call this guy". I was also looking for a job at the time and the link was from Craigslist so naturally I assumed my good friend had seen a career opportunity for me. Yep. You guessed it. The Brit was down with the tea, but not with going down on the crumpet. I saw that! That's the same face everyone made when I finally revealed my silent pain. I've considered about replying to either for more material. I love my friend for keeping me distracted while I lick my wounds.
Putting My Mouth Where The Money Is
Can I just tell you how happy I've been since I've discovered that I can make a decent living playing make-believe? I get to create little scenarios and gab and and get paid for it! Well I haven't been paid for it yet or even auditioned really.....but my training is going splendidly! I'm learning to give myself permission to let go, adlib, and make my mark. Take home excersie, practice saying "You the monster. Welcome to Monster.com" in three completely different character voices or attitudes. I've tried sultry, cheerleader, and matter of factly. Suggestions?
My favorite thing today: Clearing up a misunderstanding with a friend.
Can I just tell you how happy I've been since I've discovered that I can make a decent living playing make-believe? I get to create little scenarios and gab and and get paid for it! Well I haven't been paid for it yet or even auditioned really.....but my training is going splendidly! I'm learning to give myself permission to let go, adlib, and make my mark. Take home excersie, practice saying "You the monster. Welcome to Monster.com" in three completely different character voices or attitudes. I've tried sultry, cheerleader, and matter of factly. Suggestions?
My favorite thing today: Clearing up a misunderstanding with a friend.
May 23, 2002
Turning a New Kind of Page
I've been keeping a journal for a lot of years. The pages certainly fill quicker when I'm faced with adversity, but I like to jot down things that I'm grateful for as well, for those 'desperately adverse' times. Sometimes I get so anxious to get home and get thoughts out of my head and onto paper, that I get butterflies. I reserved my blog for entertainment purposes. I felt my inner ramblings were entirely too personal and boring to other people to share. But in the last 6 days, I have discovered a new liberation. The thrill of thinking that someone may actually read what I've written and identify with it or find it amusing has got me jazzed. I actually learned last night that the latest man had popped onto my blog recently. He once made a comment that since I don't post often, people won't check it. Fair. I thought I was completely safe posting about him. He said since we hadn't talked he wanted to see if I was writing. I'm sure I won't get anymore hits from him in the future, but it was neat to think someone cared to see what I had to say. It won't be the most articulate. It will have misspelled words. It will consist of stream-of-coniousness thoughts that only I will find amusing. That's the beauty of not striving for perfection, but trying to make a connection. I can't help but thing there may be someone who has bookmarked my page and checks back every now and again. I'm sure the owners of a lot of blogs that I peek into don't know I'm there. I'll certainly never give up blubbering with pen in hand in my comfy bed with my furry roomie curled up next to me, but I can eliminate the butterflies for the time being by getting behind the nearest pc. Guess I have the latest man to partially thank, after all, he's Mr. Blogger.
I've been keeping a journal for a lot of years. The pages certainly fill quicker when I'm faced with adversity, but I like to jot down things that I'm grateful for as well, for those 'desperately adverse' times. Sometimes I get so anxious to get home and get thoughts out of my head and onto paper, that I get butterflies. I reserved my blog for entertainment purposes. I felt my inner ramblings were entirely too personal and boring to other people to share. But in the last 6 days, I have discovered a new liberation. The thrill of thinking that someone may actually read what I've written and identify with it or find it amusing has got me jazzed. I actually learned last night that the latest man had popped onto my blog recently. He once made a comment that since I don't post often, people won't check it. Fair. I thought I was completely safe posting about him. He said since we hadn't talked he wanted to see if I was writing. I'm sure I won't get anymore hits from him in the future, but it was neat to think someone cared to see what I had to say. It won't be the most articulate. It will have misspelled words. It will consist of stream-of-coniousness thoughts that only I will find amusing. That's the beauty of not striving for perfection, but trying to make a connection. I can't help but thing there may be someone who has bookmarked my page and checks back every now and again. I'm sure the owners of a lot of blogs that I peek into don't know I'm there. I'll certainly never give up blubbering with pen in hand in my comfy bed with my furry roomie curled up next to me, but I can eliminate the butterflies for the time being by getting behind the nearest pc. Guess I have the latest man to partially thank, after all, he's Mr. Blogger.
My Little Bro-Bro
I just spoke to the social services agent that has been assigned to my brother's case, and have found out absolutely NOTHING. Because I'm not hte person who initiated the concern, they cannot release information to me as Frank thought. He won't be back in town from his tugboat run until June 21st so I'm left to wonder if the case has warranted an investigation or not. Whatever they decide they will send Frank a postcard letting him know their course of action. I was able to supply more information that I felt was important, I hope it makes a difference. I hope my brother is safe.
I just spoke to the social services agent that has been assigned to my brother's case, and have found out absolutely NOTHING. Because I'm not hte person who initiated the concern, they cannot release information to me as Frank thought. He won't be back in town from his tugboat run until June 21st so I'm left to wonder if the case has warranted an investigation or not. Whatever they decide they will send Frank a postcard letting him know their course of action. I was able to supply more information that I felt was important, I hope it makes a difference. I hope my brother is safe.
Fooey!
So it turns out it was a compatability issue with the man. Not really how we get along, he enjoys my company as much as I enjoy his, he just doesn't feel that deeper connection with me as he has for others in the past. That I understand. I had just broken up with the Brit only 11 days before I met this one for that very same reason. Everyone has the right to pick and choose. That's not say to say that it doesn't SUCK when you're not chosen. At least he didn't sugar coat it with a lame excuse like we've all heard in the past, i.e. "It's not you it's me, I'm not ready now but when I am".... Hopefully in time I'll be able to give him a call and we can hang out again. He's a neat guy who I'd like to have as a friend. I'm not heartbroken, just disappointed. I've been smitten before, and I'll be smitten again!
My favorite thing today: Closure.
So it turns out it was a compatability issue with the man. Not really how we get along, he enjoys my company as much as I enjoy his, he just doesn't feel that deeper connection with me as he has for others in the past. That I understand. I had just broken up with the Brit only 11 days before I met this one for that very same reason. Everyone has the right to pick and choose. That's not say to say that it doesn't SUCK when you're not chosen. At least he didn't sugar coat it with a lame excuse like we've all heard in the past, i.e. "It's not you it's me, I'm not ready now but when I am".... Hopefully in time I'll be able to give him a call and we can hang out again. He's a neat guy who I'd like to have as a friend. I'm not heartbroken, just disappointed. I've been smitten before, and I'll be smitten again!
My favorite thing today: Closure.
May 22, 2002
Pay It Forward
Last night a friend told me that his sister's husband was pulled over and busted with pot. In his military uniform. 3 months away from retirement. A month after being diagnosed with hepetitis-c. He couldn't figure out why his 43 year-old brother-in- law had pot while in uniform. He was worried about what was going to happen to his sister now that they wouldn't have guaranteed income. While my friend was visiting me his cell phone rang off the hook until he finally gave in and took the call. It was his sister with unbelievably good news. Seems her husband has lost a tremendous amount of weight since his diagnosis, and just wanted a way to find his appetite. He shared this with the cop, and the cop let him know that his own wife was just diagnosed with a terminal illness. He threw the bulk of the pot out, measured a little in a baggie, and the announced that the remainder 'wasn't even pot'. Human compassion is still out there.
My favorite thing today: The love and support of friends.
Last night a friend told me that his sister's husband was pulled over and busted with pot. In his military uniform. 3 months away from retirement. A month after being diagnosed with hepetitis-c. He couldn't figure out why his 43 year-old brother-in- law had pot while in uniform. He was worried about what was going to happen to his sister now that they wouldn't have guaranteed income. While my friend was visiting me his cell phone rang off the hook until he finally gave in and took the call. It was his sister with unbelievably good news. Seems her husband has lost a tremendous amount of weight since his diagnosis, and just wanted a way to find his appetite. He shared this with the cop, and the cop let him know that his own wife was just diagnosed with a terminal illness. He threw the bulk of the pot out, measured a little in a baggie, and the announced that the remainder 'wasn't even pot'. Human compassion is still out there.
My favorite thing today: The love and support of friends.
May 20, 2002
Why Does My Heart Feel So Bad?
I'm enjoying this thunderstorm today. I often complain that there isn't enough diversity in the weather here in SF as compared to VA, but today I am oddly comforted by what most consider crappy weather. We had been dating casually and happily for the last 2 months. Recently I felt myself leaning in closer and thought about initiating a conversation about where we might be headed. Last night we had "the talk", which had it gone better would have been written "last night we became a couple". I suppose I shouldn't think that all is lost just because he didn't immediately react the way I'd hoped. I'd be willing to consider a relationship that may require more effort than I'm used to giving to because I feel like the reward is worth it with him. I'm waiting to hear if he feels the same. This morning I saw pictures of us from a party we went to last weekend and we look smitten with each other. We look like we fit. There's no issue about whether or not we're compatable, it's more of priority and timing. I want to woo him, to write a "How do I like thee" list to win him over. I am confident that the universe would never present me with situations that I cannot handle, and between my brother and the man, I am surely embarking on a period of growth. My brother's case worker won't be back in the office until Thursday. Uncertainty SUCKS!
My favorite thing today: The little divot in the middle of his upper lip.
I'm enjoying this thunderstorm today. I often complain that there isn't enough diversity in the weather here in SF as compared to VA, but today I am oddly comforted by what most consider crappy weather. We had been dating casually and happily for the last 2 months. Recently I felt myself leaning in closer and thought about initiating a conversation about where we might be headed. Last night we had "the talk", which had it gone better would have been written "last night we became a couple". I suppose I shouldn't think that all is lost just because he didn't immediately react the way I'd hoped. I'd be willing to consider a relationship that may require more effort than I'm used to giving to because I feel like the reward is worth it with him. I'm waiting to hear if he feels the same. This morning I saw pictures of us from a party we went to last weekend and we look smitten with each other. We look like we fit. There's no issue about whether or not we're compatable, it's more of priority and timing. I want to woo him, to write a "How do I like thee" list to win him over. I am confident that the universe would never present me with situations that I cannot handle, and between my brother and the man, I am surely embarking on a period of growth. My brother's case worker won't be back in the office until Thursday. Uncertainty SUCKS!
My favorite thing today: The little divot in the middle of his upper lip.
May 17, 2002
One Hundred and Eighty Degrees
Today I am so low, I want nothing more than to have someone hold me and tell me it's going to be okay.
I spoke to my youngest brother's father this morning. I don't know how much clearer I can convey to him how desperate the situation is. I've been telling him since February of this year, in graphic detail, the living conditions my brother, his son, has been living in with my lost it long ago mother. And yet as I balled my eyes out while on the phone with him, he said I must know something he doesn't if it's so bad to make me cry. He doesn't mind having to adjust his life to make room for Monty, but he says he cannot afford it. I just found out that he has a college aged son, and he pays for his tuition and car insurance. Frank says that alone takes about half of his monthly pay. I called Frank months ago regarding this because as his father, I wanted to give him the option of custody before I called social services to try and take custody of him myself, or before they put him in a foster home. I decide the fate of my brother's life. I don't know that I could provide an adequate life for him. I make enough to pay my bills and give myself small pleasures. I'd need money for his food, his clothes, child care, toys, activities, school supplies, medical care, and the countless other things that just come up. ......"Where's the humorous JupiterGIRL we all know and love"? This entry should have made it into my personal journal that I write each night. But I couldn't wait to release these woes from my noggin, and I didn't want to jot it down on paper and take the chance of someone here in the office finding it. So you're just going to have to deal with the reality that lies behind many upbeat postings. Am I ready to sacrifice my 30's to another sibling? I don't have any resentment towards Trey and K.C. It wasn't their fault that I became their make shift Mom when I was 15. And I didn't give it any thought, I just slipped into the role because they needed me. In addition to being a high school student with a part-time job I found time to cook their dinner, make their lunches, wash their clothes, dress them for school, and help with their homework. Maybe my 20's were for me, and now it's time for me to take care of someone else again. I didn't have a choice then, but now it's entirely my decision. Then my selfish voice speaks up. I am so happy with the life I have now. Sometimes things are going so well, I have to watch a sad movie to cry and keep the balance. I am truly blessed. I have an amazing circle of friends, I can provide for myself comfortably, I'm a social butterfly, I've just discovered a creative talent that I love and I'm actually good at, and who wants to date a 28 year-old woman with a 7 year-old? You know I'm the first person to find the optimistic side of semmingly hopeless, but I'm used to being a dating machine. I think I'd feel guilty flirting with someone just so that I can spring on them "By the way I have the responsibility of a school aged child". I'm sure there are plenty of nice guys who would be willing to accept this challenging situation. Can I post my ad on Craigslist now and get a head start? As I try to sit back in my chair and realax, the strength of of my heartbeat is so hard I'm involuntarily rocking back and forth.
My favorite thing today: Warm mugs of tea
Today I am so low, I want nothing more than to have someone hold me and tell me it's going to be okay.
I spoke to my youngest brother's father this morning. I don't know how much clearer I can convey to him how desperate the situation is. I've been telling him since February of this year, in graphic detail, the living conditions my brother, his son, has been living in with my lost it long ago mother. And yet as I balled my eyes out while on the phone with him, he said I must know something he doesn't if it's so bad to make me cry. He doesn't mind having to adjust his life to make room for Monty, but he says he cannot afford it. I just found out that he has a college aged son, and he pays for his tuition and car insurance. Frank says that alone takes about half of his monthly pay. I called Frank months ago regarding this because as his father, I wanted to give him the option of custody before I called social services to try and take custody of him myself, or before they put him in a foster home. I decide the fate of my brother's life. I don't know that I could provide an adequate life for him. I make enough to pay my bills and give myself small pleasures. I'd need money for his food, his clothes, child care, toys, activities, school supplies, medical care, and the countless other things that just come up. ......"Where's the humorous JupiterGIRL we all know and love"? This entry should have made it into my personal journal that I write each night. But I couldn't wait to release these woes from my noggin, and I didn't want to jot it down on paper and take the chance of someone here in the office finding it. So you're just going to have to deal with the reality that lies behind many upbeat postings. Am I ready to sacrifice my 30's to another sibling? I don't have any resentment towards Trey and K.C. It wasn't their fault that I became their make shift Mom when I was 15. And I didn't give it any thought, I just slipped into the role because they needed me. In addition to being a high school student with a part-time job I found time to cook their dinner, make their lunches, wash their clothes, dress them for school, and help with their homework. Maybe my 20's were for me, and now it's time for me to take care of someone else again. I didn't have a choice then, but now it's entirely my decision. Then my selfish voice speaks up. I am so happy with the life I have now. Sometimes things are going so well, I have to watch a sad movie to cry and keep the balance. I am truly blessed. I have an amazing circle of friends, I can provide for myself comfortably, I'm a social butterfly, I've just discovered a creative talent that I love and I'm actually good at, and who wants to date a 28 year-old woman with a 7 year-old? You know I'm the first person to find the optimistic side of semmingly hopeless, but I'm used to being a dating machine. I think I'd feel guilty flirting with someone just so that I can spring on them "By the way I have the responsibility of a school aged child". I'm sure there are plenty of nice guys who would be willing to accept this challenging situation. Can I post my ad on Craigslist now and get a head start? As I try to sit back in my chair and realax, the strength of of my heartbeat is so hard I'm involuntarily rocking back and forth.
My favorite thing today: Warm mugs of tea
Female Roommate Wanted
Some friends were joking the other night that it would be funny for a guy to run a false advert claiming 'room for rent' just to meet girls. Although it sounds like it would succeed, how would that change your attitude down the road when you discover that the way that you met your honey was not that cute happy little accident but a desperate (not to mention lazy)attempt to have girls parade through his flat for a SCAN, SELECT, DISCARD, MOVE ON session. Perhaps after you've been with him for a while and those little details would be insignificant. Perhaps your love would have grown bigger than trivial tid-bids. Perhaps you'd feel disgusted everytime you looked at him causing you to create a little pick and choose session of your own interviewing 'pool boys'.
Some friends were joking the other night that it would be funny for a guy to run a false advert claiming 'room for rent' just to meet girls. Although it sounds like it would succeed, how would that change your attitude down the road when you discover that the way that you met your honey was not that cute happy little accident but a desperate (not to mention lazy)attempt to have girls parade through his flat for a SCAN, SELECT, DISCARD, MOVE ON session. Perhaps after you've been with him for a while and those little details would be insignificant. Perhaps your love would have grown bigger than trivial tid-bids. Perhaps you'd feel disgusted everytime you looked at him causing you to create a little pick and choose session of your own interviewing 'pool boys'.
May 15, 2002
Guerrero and Liberty Please
The last three cab drivers I've had have been HOT! I normally like making small talk with my transportation specialist, but lately I've been down right flirty. The first dashing driver gave me a lift from the Caltrain station on my way home from work at the design firm in B.F.E. He was covered in tats, with spikey hair, and had tales of his own design endeavors in the house that he just bought. Even invited me to check it out. It was just a couple of blocks away, on the shady end of Shotwell Street. I politely declined. I said he was hot, not that I'm stupid. The next casanova cabbie whisked me home after my voice acting class ran late and I needed to get ready for a party in a jiff. Blonde hair, nice tan, great smile. Between swerving lanes and tailgating, he tried to win me over by relating to the voice talent nitch. He does comedy tapes with his brother. He records the voice mails for a lot of his friends. He ran a really red light nearly ending my life. As he tried handing me his card I shouted 'gotta run', and bolted out of the rear passenger door, thanking the goddess I was alive. The final fine fare taker was a dark skin college student, who rushed me home after an interview ran late because I needed to get home to watch 24. He's going to school for international business, he was pleasant. I think he was going to drop me off on a median. He did not know what 24 was. I wished him "la bonne chance ovec l'ecole", and ran inside to find out who was betraying Jack Bauer.
These are not your parents' cabbies.
The last three cab drivers I've had have been HOT! I normally like making small talk with my transportation specialist, but lately I've been down right flirty. The first dashing driver gave me a lift from the Caltrain station on my way home from work at the design firm in B.F.E. He was covered in tats, with spikey hair, and had tales of his own design endeavors in the house that he just bought. Even invited me to check it out. It was just a couple of blocks away, on the shady end of Shotwell Street. I politely declined. I said he was hot, not that I'm stupid. The next casanova cabbie whisked me home after my voice acting class ran late and I needed to get ready for a party in a jiff. Blonde hair, nice tan, great smile. Between swerving lanes and tailgating, he tried to win me over by relating to the voice talent nitch. He does comedy tapes with his brother. He records the voice mails for a lot of his friends. He ran a really red light nearly ending my life. As he tried handing me his card I shouted 'gotta run', and bolted out of the rear passenger door, thanking the goddess I was alive. The final fine fare taker was a dark skin college student, who rushed me home after an interview ran late because I needed to get home to watch 24. He's going to school for international business, he was pleasant. I think he was going to drop me off on a median. He did not know what 24 was. I wished him "la bonne chance ovec l'ecole", and ran inside to find out who was betraying Jack Bauer.
These are not your parents' cabbies.
May 03, 2002
Bohunk: "Um, I'm like here to clean your pool."
Lonely Rich Housewife: "Oh, but we don't have a pool."
I, for one, believe Mrs. Lehman has a very valid point.
Lonely Rich Housewife: "Oh, but we don't have a pool."
I, for one, believe Mrs. Lehman has a very valid point.
April 30, 2002
Some are born with silver spoons. Others.......
SO!
I just started working for an interior design firm and it's nice to be surrounded by beautiful patterns and fine things. Part of my job is to open incoming packages, figure which project the piece is for, record that it was received, and inform the head designer. In the last 3 days I've received paint catalogs, fabric swatches, and tile samples. Neat, but not thrilling. Today, JACKPOT! A silver cocktail shaker, with engraved drink ingredients diagonally around the bottom, and drink names engraved along the top, and when the top and bottom are turned accordingly, it gives you the recipe for standard drinks. Accompanying this handy accessory was a set of silver coasters. I twisted the shaker and announced the drink components in an infomercial fashion. I pretended to shake the shaker shaking my booty and singing "La Kuka Racha, La Kuka Racha" (again hooked on Fonix worked for me). I pawed the coasters, breaking into my Stuffy English Country Club Lady character, "Ooo Lovey, aren't these coasters simply divine". I then discovered burried under foam peanuts, the packing slip. I scanned the sheet to double check the accuracy of content and my knees literally went weak. Who in the HELL put me in charge of handling $750.00 silver (oh yes, solid, not plated as I had assumed) cocktail shakers and $1,350 "Buffy do put this little coaster under your beverage please, that table is antique" solid silver coasters. I'm told I'll get used to it, and no doubt the day will come when I scoff at the $10,000 drapery material that is on it's way to cover the windows in the bar room that the shaker and coasters will reside. I always compare pricey things in relation to my rent because it's my largest expense. Hmmm, have a place to live for a month, or have something really stylish to rest my bottle of hooch on while lying in a gutter waiting for my unemployment check to come in? Don't laugh, women are known to make exorbitant purchases.
I.C.M.U.
qr
SO!
I just started working for an interior design firm and it's nice to be surrounded by beautiful patterns and fine things. Part of my job is to open incoming packages, figure which project the piece is for, record that it was received, and inform the head designer. In the last 3 days I've received paint catalogs, fabric swatches, and tile samples. Neat, but not thrilling. Today, JACKPOT! A silver cocktail shaker, with engraved drink ingredients diagonally around the bottom, and drink names engraved along the top, and when the top and bottom are turned accordingly, it gives you the recipe for standard drinks. Accompanying this handy accessory was a set of silver coasters. I twisted the shaker and announced the drink components in an infomercial fashion. I pretended to shake the shaker shaking my booty and singing "La Kuka Racha, La Kuka Racha" (again hooked on Fonix worked for me). I pawed the coasters, breaking into my Stuffy English Country Club Lady character, "Ooo Lovey, aren't these coasters simply divine". I then discovered burried under foam peanuts, the packing slip. I scanned the sheet to double check the accuracy of content and my knees literally went weak. Who in the HELL put me in charge of handling $750.00 silver (oh yes, solid, not plated as I had assumed) cocktail shakers and $1,350 "Buffy do put this little coaster under your beverage please, that table is antique" solid silver coasters. I'm told I'll get used to it, and no doubt the day will come when I scoff at the $10,000 drapery material that is on it's way to cover the windows in the bar room that the shaker and coasters will reside. I always compare pricey things in relation to my rent because it's my largest expense. Hmmm, have a place to live for a month, or have something really stylish to rest my bottle of hooch on while lying in a gutter waiting for my unemployment check to come in? Don't laugh, women are known to make exorbitant purchases.
I.C.M.U.
qr
April 20, 2002
April 07, 2002
Home Sweet Home
A few months ago I immersed myself in the manic task of finding a place to live. I never made it to actually see the apartments mentioned in a Craigslist ad that read "MOVE IN SPECIAL-FIRST MONTH FREE". Luckily the internet cummunity was happy to volunteer their opinions and share their experiences via aptratings.com for all who inquired. My personal favorite was the posting dated 11/12.
Fillmore Apartments
A few months ago I immersed myself in the manic task of finding a place to live. I never made it to actually see the apartments mentioned in a Craigslist ad that read "MOVE IN SPECIAL-FIRST MONTH FREE". Luckily the internet cummunity was happy to volunteer their opinions and share their experiences via aptratings.com for all who inquired. My personal favorite was the posting dated 11/12.
Fillmore Apartments
March 07, 2002
Tribs to NWA & Tupac By Kermit & The Swedish Chef
Staight out da Lillie Pond
Crazy Muthafucka called Kermit
From the gang called Muppets Wit Permits
For sawed offs
Fuck da guns laws
Squeez da trigger and Muppets are hauled off
I bee in dee game for da ten years makin dee rap tunes, erg dergee
ever sinsah dee honeys wud wearin da sassoon
Now it's '02 and day clock me and day watch me, orgee borgee
Dia monds shinin lookin like I robbed dee Liberace
It's all good, bork bork, from Diego to da Bay
Yer city is da bom if yer city makin da pay
Trow up da finger if ya feel the same way, gaydee daydee
Svedish Cheff puttin it down for
Californ-i-ay, ok?
Miss Piggy's Revenge
Here comes The Pig Proper straight outta of a sty, you don't believe me? Look in my eye.
Feel the wrath cause now it's my time, I think you're the one that's a swine.
Kermit's frog legs better git ta hoppin', cause once I set my sights, there's no stoppin'
the P the I the G the G the Y. I bring home the bacon, Miss Piggy ain't fakin',
you need to step off, this is my turn at the trough. I don't need no gang a' muppets, I don't need no man,
you better check yourself if you think I'm tomorrow's ham.
SuEEEEEEEEE
Staight out da Lillie Pond
Crazy Muthafucka called Kermit
From the gang called Muppets Wit Permits
For sawed offs
Fuck da guns laws
Squeez da trigger and Muppets are hauled off
I bee in dee game for da ten years makin dee rap tunes, erg dergee
ever sinsah dee honeys wud wearin da sassoon
Now it's '02 and day clock me and day watch me, orgee borgee
Dia monds shinin lookin like I robbed dee Liberace
It's all good, bork bork, from Diego to da Bay
Yer city is da bom if yer city makin da pay
Trow up da finger if ya feel the same way, gaydee daydee
Svedish Cheff puttin it down for
Californ-i-ay, ok?
Miss Piggy's Revenge
Here comes The Pig Proper straight outta of a sty, you don't believe me? Look in my eye.
Feel the wrath cause now it's my time, I think you're the one that's a swine.
Kermit's frog legs better git ta hoppin', cause once I set my sights, there's no stoppin'
the P the I the G the G the Y. I bring home the bacon, Miss Piggy ain't fakin',
you need to step off, this is my turn at the trough. I don't need no gang a' muppets, I don't need no man,
you better check yourself if you think I'm tomorrow's ham.
SuEEEEEEEEE
November 08, 2001
Move Over Good Vibrations...
Ladees Nite 11/7/01 was EPIC! Our hostess suggested we all bring in clothes that would other wise be donted to good will, to give our fellow females first dibs at some new threads. Not only did most ladees score, but our hotess with the mostess also treated us to home made broccoli casserole and mashed potatoes. Throw in home made bread and home made chocolate pudding provided by little Sarah, and this was the kind of gathering dreams were made of. But it gets better. In addition to a woman's 2 favorite elements of food and clothing, we were introduced to our new source of decadence-The Orgasmatron. Sounds kinky when you think that this was an all girl party, but allow me to clarify. The Orgasmatron is an understated modern marvel of jubilation. Resemlbing that of a kitchen whisk, an artistic Spider or a piece of science equipment as we all mistook this hero for, the Orgasmatron is simply a copper wire scalp massager. Yes Gentleman, for the first time it actaully happened; a group of 10 hot women, half dressed, happily fed, rubbing each others heads to the point of uncontrolled giggling.
Ladees Nite 11/7/01 was EPIC! Our hostess suggested we all bring in clothes that would other wise be donted to good will, to give our fellow females first dibs at some new threads. Not only did most ladees score, but our hotess with the mostess also treated us to home made broccoli casserole and mashed potatoes. Throw in home made bread and home made chocolate pudding provided by little Sarah, and this was the kind of gathering dreams were made of. But it gets better. In addition to a woman's 2 favorite elements of food and clothing, we were introduced to our new source of decadence-The Orgasmatron. Sounds kinky when you think that this was an all girl party, but allow me to clarify. The Orgasmatron is an understated modern marvel of jubilation. Resemlbing that of a kitchen whisk, an artistic Spider or a piece of science equipment as we all mistook this hero for, the Orgasmatron is simply a copper wire scalp massager. Yes Gentleman, for the first time it actaully happened; a group of 10 hot women, half dressed, happily fed, rubbing each others heads to the point of uncontrolled giggling.
November 07, 2001
November 06, 2001
GODDESS BLESS AMERICA
New State Mottos:
Alabama:
Yes, we have electricity
Arizona:
But It’s a Dry Heat
Arkansas:
Litterasy Ain’t Everthing
California:
As Seen on TV
Colorado:
If You Don’t Ski, Don’t Bother
Connecticut:
Like Massachusetts, Only Dirtier and With Less Character
Delaware:
We Really Do Like the Chemicals in our Water
Florida:
Ask Us About Our Grandkids
Georgia:
We Put the “Fun” in Fundamentalist Extremism
Hawaii:
Haka Tiki Mou Sha’ami Leeki Toru
(Death to Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)
Idaho:
Potatoes and NeoNazi’s ... What More Could You Ask For?
Illinois:
Please Don’t Pronounce the “S”
Indiana:
2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free
Iowa:
We Do Amazing Things With Corn
Kansas:
Where Science Don’t Mean Shit
Kentucky:
Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names
Louisiana:
We’re Not All Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That’s Our Tourism Campaign
Maine:
We’re Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster
Maryland:
A Thinking Man’s Delaware
Massachusetts:
Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden’s (For Most Tax Brackets)
Michigan:
First Line of Defense From the Canadians
Minnesota:
10,000 Lakes and 10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes
Mississippi:
Come Feel Better About Your Own State
Missouri:
Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars at Work
Montana:
Land of the Big Sky, the Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies, and Very
Little Else
Nebraska:
Ask About Our State Motto Contest
Nevada:
Whores and Poker!
New Hampshire:
Go Away and Leave Us Alone
New Jersey:
You Want a ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here!
New Mexico:
Lizards Make Excellent Pets
New York:
You Have the Right to Remain Silent, You Have the Right to an Attorney...
North Carolina:
Tobacco is a Vegetable
North Dakota:
We Really are One of the 50 States!
Ohio:
At Least We’re Not Michigan
Oklahoma:
Like the Play, only No Singing
Oregon:
Spotted Owl... It’s What’s For Dinner
Pennsylvania:
Cook With Coal
Rhode Island:
We’re Not REALLY An Island
South Carolina:
Remember the Civil War? We Didn’t Actually Surrender
South Dakota:
Closer Than North Dakota
Tennessee:
The Educashun State
Texas:
Si’ Hablo Ing’les
(Yes, I speak English)
Utah:
Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus
Vermont:
Yep
Virginia:
Who Says Government Stiffs and Slackjaw Yokels Don’t Mix?
Washington:
Help! We’re Overrun By Nerds and Slackers!
Washington, D.C.:
Wanna Be Mayor?
West Virginia:
One Big Happy Family-Really!
Wisconsin:
Come Cut Our Cheese
Wyoming:
Where men are men and sheep are scared
New State Mottos:
Alabama:
Yes, we have electricity
Arizona:
But It’s a Dry Heat
Arkansas:
Litterasy Ain’t Everthing
California:
As Seen on TV
Colorado:
If You Don’t Ski, Don’t Bother
Connecticut:
Like Massachusetts, Only Dirtier and With Less Character
Delaware:
We Really Do Like the Chemicals in our Water
Florida:
Ask Us About Our Grandkids
Georgia:
We Put the “Fun” in Fundamentalist Extremism
Hawaii:
Haka Tiki Mou Sha’ami Leeki Toru
(Death to Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)
Idaho:
Potatoes and NeoNazi’s ... What More Could You Ask For?
Illinois:
Please Don’t Pronounce the “S”
Indiana:
2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free
Iowa:
We Do Amazing Things With Corn
Kansas:
Where Science Don’t Mean Shit
Kentucky:
Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names
Louisiana:
We’re Not All Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That’s Our Tourism Campaign
Maine:
We’re Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster
Maryland:
A Thinking Man’s Delaware
Massachusetts:
Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden’s (For Most Tax Brackets)
Michigan:
First Line of Defense From the Canadians
Minnesota:
10,000 Lakes and 10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes
Mississippi:
Come Feel Better About Your Own State
Missouri:
Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars at Work
Montana:
Land of the Big Sky, the Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies, and Very
Little Else
Nebraska:
Ask About Our State Motto Contest
Nevada:
Whores and Poker!
New Hampshire:
Go Away and Leave Us Alone
New Jersey:
You Want a ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here!
New Mexico:
Lizards Make Excellent Pets
New York:
You Have the Right to Remain Silent, You Have the Right to an Attorney...
North Carolina:
Tobacco is a Vegetable
North Dakota:
We Really are One of the 50 States!
Ohio:
At Least We’re Not Michigan
Oklahoma:
Like the Play, only No Singing
Oregon:
Spotted Owl... It’s What’s For Dinner
Pennsylvania:
Cook With Coal
Rhode Island:
We’re Not REALLY An Island
South Carolina:
Remember the Civil War? We Didn’t Actually Surrender
South Dakota:
Closer Than North Dakota
Tennessee:
The Educashun State
Texas:
Si’ Hablo Ing’les
(Yes, I speak English)
Utah:
Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus
Vermont:
Yep
Virginia:
Who Says Government Stiffs and Slackjaw Yokels Don’t Mix?
Washington:
Help! We’re Overrun By Nerds and Slackers!
Washington, D.C.:
Wanna Be Mayor?
West Virginia:
One Big Happy Family-Really!
Wisconsin:
Come Cut Our Cheese
Wyoming:
Where men are men and sheep are scared
October 08, 2001
Strolling Down Mammary Lane
My roomie and I expect the frenzy of attention we receive going topless and painted at the annual Folsom Street Fair in San Francisco. What we did not expect but are not surprised by, is the fact that my roommate was presented with pictures of us from Folsom Street Fairs passed, by the proprietors of a fetish shop while visiting her hometown of Binghamton, New York!
My roomie and I expect the frenzy of attention we receive going topless and painted at the annual Folsom Street Fair in San Francisco. What we did not expect but are not surprised by, is the fact that my roommate was presented with pictures of us from Folsom Street Fairs passed, by the proprietors of a fetish shop while visiting her hometown of Binghamton, New York!
October 03, 2001
Simon Sez…
As if the Full Moon hadn’t warranted enough odd behavior,(and I do believe having a good friend propose an orgy certainly quantifies), but now for the first time in nearly a decade, and much to the dismay of the Bay area bachelor population, I have been caught. I am unavailable, I am part of a happy couple, I have a significant other, I AM SOMEONE’S GIRLFRIEND! Be afraid. Be very afraid. If you haven’t already had the delight of meeting this wonderful man, rest assured you will soon, for I now have a permanent date for all of my social affairs. Stay tuned to see how my Blog postings transform from “This Week’s Men Line Up”, to “So my boyfriend and I…”
Stranger things have happened.
qr
And the Beat Goes On
As if the Full Moon hadn’t warranted enough odd behavior,(and I do believe having a good friend propose an orgy certainly quantifies), but now for the first time in nearly a decade, and much to the dismay of the Bay area bachelor population, I have been caught. I am unavailable, I am part of a happy couple, I have a significant other, I AM SOMEONE’S GIRLFRIEND! Be afraid. Be very afraid. If you haven’t already had the delight of meeting this wonderful man, rest assured you will soon, for I now have a permanent date for all of my social affairs. Stay tuned to see how my Blog postings transform from “This Week’s Men Line Up”, to “So my boyfriend and I…”
Stranger things have happened.
qr
And the Beat Goes On
September 18, 2001
Why does eating healthy cost so much more? It's the same at all organic/urban hippie markets, (standing in line with a dread headed girl dressed in a potato sack talking on her cell phone) I'm not singling out Rainbow, but is the message that only the wealthy are allowed to eat better and live longer? Anyway, Rainbow was much bigger than I thought, and I was quite impressed with the diversity of goods stacked on their shelves. I found everything from children's books about potty training titled "Everyone Poops", to hemp tampons.
September 14, 2001
EVIDENCE OF BALANCE
Last night on my bus ride home, a cute, young, Latin boy asked out loud where Leavenworth Street was. An older black gentleman and myself both responded, and the passenger was especially grateful, spreading a smile across all three of our faces. It felt good to be useful during these troubling days, no matter how common the request, or miniscule the effect. A few stops later, as the Latin boy was exiting the bus, a female passenger sitting across from the side door, through her gum wrapper off of the bus into the street as the doors opened.
Last night on my bus ride home, a cute, young, Latin boy asked out loud where Leavenworth Street was. An older black gentleman and myself both responded, and the passenger was especially grateful, spreading a smile across all three of our faces. It felt good to be useful during these troubling days, no matter how common the request, or miniscule the effect. A few stops later, as the Latin boy was exiting the bus, a female passenger sitting across from the side door, through her gum wrapper off of the bus into the street as the doors opened.
September 10, 2001
August 30, 2001
LUCIFER LIVES IN THE RICHMOND
So the big buzz at the moment is Burning Man. I hadn’t given it much thought since last year having faced the challenges of cold/windy/rainy weather, a twisted group of candy-flippers for travel companions, and a manic closet-homosexual posing as a foster camp. The vibe itself was fundamentally good, it’s amazing to be surrounded by 26,000 diverse people who come together with the intention to bring creativity to life and treating everyone like a close friend, but I also think that it was used as a platform for perverts to gather and exhibit their tastelessness. I know, I know, freedom of expression means allowing ALL to be free, and who am I to justify one act as art and another as obscene, however, if you can find artistic merit or brotherly love in a 65 year old naked man who rides a bike around making good use of a dildo strapped to the seat and I will gladly retract my statement.
I tossed the idea of going again around briefly last month when the hum was growing stronger, but seeing as I’ve been traveling the country for the last 10 weeks, funding would not allow it. I wouldn’t mind visiting Black Rock city again, now that I’ve been I have a better concept of do’s and don’ts, but I have to admit I’m a bit jaded by the freak appeal, especially after what I saw Friday night.
A friend and I were walking home around 1:00 am in the Richmond. We turned the corner from 4th Street onto Clement, and fast approaching was a 7 foot tall Satan. I found it most remarkable that he was actually walking on black hooves with black fur around the ankles. He had shoulder length straight black hair, and his hairline was extremely receded exposing the entire top of his head. He was sporting incredibly realistic horns and fangs, against convincingly pale skin. He was dressed in black pants and a rich red, cape like jacket that hung down below his knees. I actually don’t remember how our conversation was initiated; I was so engrossed in the genuineness of his get up. As not to offend, I asked if this was his usual form or if he was in costume for a reason. He answered that he was on his way home from performing stand-up comedy down the street. I complimented him on his fabulous duds, and like a child at show-and-tell, he lifted the bald skin from atop his head, exposing a gnarly, what I can only presume to be life like brain, and laughed a demonic laugh with the aid of a voice altering box. Running with the oddity of it all, I suggested he add gooey blood to the brain for effect, and drink some hot tea for his throat. I bid him a good evening to which he replied, “You too. See you later, but you guys got a while”. Wow, I feel like I've been given a new license to live! I'm going to make every day count!
Who needs to go all the way to Nevada to see freaks?
p.s. would NOT date the Prince of Darkness
So the big buzz at the moment is Burning Man. I hadn’t given it much thought since last year having faced the challenges of cold/windy/rainy weather, a twisted group of candy-flippers for travel companions, and a manic closet-homosexual posing as a foster camp. The vibe itself was fundamentally good, it’s amazing to be surrounded by 26,000 diverse people who come together with the intention to bring creativity to life and treating everyone like a close friend, but I also think that it was used as a platform for perverts to gather and exhibit their tastelessness. I know, I know, freedom of expression means allowing ALL to be free, and who am I to justify one act as art and another as obscene, however, if you can find artistic merit or brotherly love in a 65 year old naked man who rides a bike around making good use of a dildo strapped to the seat and I will gladly retract my statement.
I tossed the idea of going again around briefly last month when the hum was growing stronger, but seeing as I’ve been traveling the country for the last 10 weeks, funding would not allow it. I wouldn’t mind visiting Black Rock city again, now that I’ve been I have a better concept of do’s and don’ts, but I have to admit I’m a bit jaded by the freak appeal, especially after what I saw Friday night.
A friend and I were walking home around 1:00 am in the Richmond. We turned the corner from 4th Street onto Clement, and fast approaching was a 7 foot tall Satan. I found it most remarkable that he was actually walking on black hooves with black fur around the ankles. He had shoulder length straight black hair, and his hairline was extremely receded exposing the entire top of his head. He was sporting incredibly realistic horns and fangs, against convincingly pale skin. He was dressed in black pants and a rich red, cape like jacket that hung down below his knees. I actually don’t remember how our conversation was initiated; I was so engrossed in the genuineness of his get up. As not to offend, I asked if this was his usual form or if he was in costume for a reason. He answered that he was on his way home from performing stand-up comedy down the street. I complimented him on his fabulous duds, and like a child at show-and-tell, he lifted the bald skin from atop his head, exposing a gnarly, what I can only presume to be life like brain, and laughed a demonic laugh with the aid of a voice altering box. Running with the oddity of it all, I suggested he add gooey blood to the brain for effect, and drink some hot tea for his throat. I bid him a good evening to which he replied, “You too. See you later, but you guys got a while”. Wow, I feel like I've been given a new license to live! I'm going to make every day count!
Who needs to go all the way to Nevada to see freaks?
p.s. would NOT date the Prince of Darkness
August 23, 2001
I’M READY FOR MY CLOSE-UP!!
So I went to L.A. this weekend, and amazingly enough I wasn’t discovered! I’m sure the stone faced patron that popped in to the Green Room café had much better luck, all the best to you bucko!
I checked into my plush Motel 6 hotel room mid afternoon, and headed out to immerse myself in the celebrity playground. Friday night after a quick dip in the nazi guarded swimming pool and a public fainting spell at Cat & the Fiddle, I was ready to retire! Then at five a.m., just a couple of hours before I was ready to rise and search for Britney Spear’s star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, Gordy decided to stop partying like a rock star and come back to the hotel. In stumbles Gordy, clicking one the bright white light and slurring the mis-heard Lenny Kravitz lyrics, “I’m a stone cold killer”. I denied my little Hannibal Lector wannabe the pleasure of chopping me up with a knife, or even removing a limb, and in mid-rebuttal, he passed out.
That morning I stopped at the visitor’s center and picked up a copy of the local periodical of what’s happening in the city called the L.A. Weekly, grabbed a croissant and chamomile tea, and perused the pages next to a sweet little fountain in the ninety degree morning sun. I strolled up and down Hollywood Blvd. window-shopping in such fine stores as Frederick’s of Hollywood and The Temptress. I spotted Spiderman and X-Man hanging out in from of Mann’s Chinese Theatre. Had I had any cash left I could have had my photo taken with these true to life Super Heroes. Alas I was tapped from breakfast, and I settled for their broken English, classic Saturday morning cartoon tag line, “We like girls”.
Later on that day Gordy, Simon and I drove through the Hollywood Hills looking for Wonderland Ave. (now why didn’t we keep an eye out for rabbit holes) making a brief pit stop so that Gordy could make his mark on Hollywood. Actually, he left his mark on Sunset Blvd. near Le Brea. And he marked the sidewalk. With melon infused vomit. We then took to Melrose Avenue for spending money that we just didn’t have on things that we just didn’t need. Two hours of searching for something funky and cool in commission driven piranha infested boutiques, and we came to the conclusion that the male styles weren’t male enough, and the female styles were cheap; and I don’t mean inexpensive.
After a twelve-hour cat nap Keely was now ready to join us for a tasty meal. We stuffed ourselves with yummy Italian food served to us by the assumed aspiring screenwriter, who coincidentally seemed to share a similar style with our beloved Simon. Keely promptly retired, after all she had been horizontal all day, so the boys and I set out to mingle with the plastic people. We found ourselves in a saloon of sorts, where Wranglers were replaced with Gucci, and the boots were made by Prada. Gordy fulfilled his dream of living like a cowboy by taking the old mechanical bull for a ride. He looked damn good up there too, and we overheard someone confirming it. Unfortunately, Gordy is still singing falsetto and the doctor said the skin on his left knee should grow back within a few days. We turned in early after an amusing walk home, witnessing fashion statements that were more like commands, “Fuck me, Fuck me, Fuck me”, and a parade of luxury cars with intoxicated girls hanging out of sunroofs proclaiming their love for L.A.
Our last day in SoCal was spent in colorful Venice Beach. On our way out of Hollywood, Keely shared her suspicion of the Star Map conspiracy. Her theory is that these hoodlums actually direct you to average people’s homes who are merely dressed as celebrities, hmmmm? Once in Venice we were welcomed with a more familiar atmosphere of the homeless, street performers, sidewalk artists, and tourons. (See Reese’s collection of amalgamated words) We covered the entire strip, popping into the countless t-shirt shops and tattoo shops. Simon tickled my funny bone by pronouncing words much differently than I the Yank would. He ordered his Middle Eastern lunch as a falafel pita with the accent on the first syllable of falafel and short ‘a’s, and a short ‘i’ sound in pita. Soon after Simon’s exquisite artwork purchase and a brief it’s a small world chat about a mutual friend that he and the artist shared from overseas, and we were ever ready to return to Fog City.
Reese’s Top Five from L.A.
5. Simon is completely disgusted by watching someone vomit and day old wet swimming trunks that have been incubating in the sun in the back of the Jeep.
4. Gordy is obsessed with silicon breasts
3. To blend in while in L.A., always have a look on your face as if you’ve just smelled something really foul.
2. There are no grocery stores in L.A.
1. Motel 6 does not offer the following amenities: an iron, an in-room coffee maker, any sort of view, a friendly parking attendant, a pool, an iron, competent reservations staff, complimentary coffee/hot water after 9a.m., mini fridge, microwave, those cute little bottles of hair care and lotion, an iron, continental breakfast, laundry service, shuttle service, porters, a hot tub, room service, or an iron.
So I went to L.A. this weekend, and amazingly enough I wasn’t discovered! I’m sure the stone faced patron that popped in to the Green Room café had much better luck, all the best to you bucko!
I checked into my plush Motel 6 hotel room mid afternoon, and headed out to immerse myself in the celebrity playground. Friday night after a quick dip in the nazi guarded swimming pool and a public fainting spell at Cat & the Fiddle, I was ready to retire! Then at five a.m., just a couple of hours before I was ready to rise and search for Britney Spear’s star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, Gordy decided to stop partying like a rock star and come back to the hotel. In stumbles Gordy, clicking one the bright white light and slurring the mis-heard Lenny Kravitz lyrics, “I’m a stone cold killer”. I denied my little Hannibal Lector wannabe the pleasure of chopping me up with a knife, or even removing a limb, and in mid-rebuttal, he passed out.
That morning I stopped at the visitor’s center and picked up a copy of the local periodical of what’s happening in the city called the L.A. Weekly, grabbed a croissant and chamomile tea, and perused the pages next to a sweet little fountain in the ninety degree morning sun. I strolled up and down Hollywood Blvd. window-shopping in such fine stores as Frederick’s of Hollywood and The Temptress. I spotted Spiderman and X-Man hanging out in from of Mann’s Chinese Theatre. Had I had any cash left I could have had my photo taken with these true to life Super Heroes. Alas I was tapped from breakfast, and I settled for their broken English, classic Saturday morning cartoon tag line, “We like girls”.
Later on that day Gordy, Simon and I drove through the Hollywood Hills looking for Wonderland Ave. (now why didn’t we keep an eye out for rabbit holes) making a brief pit stop so that Gordy could make his mark on Hollywood. Actually, he left his mark on Sunset Blvd. near Le Brea. And he marked the sidewalk. With melon infused vomit. We then took to Melrose Avenue for spending money that we just didn’t have on things that we just didn’t need. Two hours of searching for something funky and cool in commission driven piranha infested boutiques, and we came to the conclusion that the male styles weren’t male enough, and the female styles were cheap; and I don’t mean inexpensive.
After a twelve-hour cat nap Keely was now ready to join us for a tasty meal. We stuffed ourselves with yummy Italian food served to us by the assumed aspiring screenwriter, who coincidentally seemed to share a similar style with our beloved Simon. Keely promptly retired, after all she had been horizontal all day, so the boys and I set out to mingle with the plastic people. We found ourselves in a saloon of sorts, where Wranglers were replaced with Gucci, and the boots were made by Prada. Gordy fulfilled his dream of living like a cowboy by taking the old mechanical bull for a ride. He looked damn good up there too, and we overheard someone confirming it. Unfortunately, Gordy is still singing falsetto and the doctor said the skin on his left knee should grow back within a few days. We turned in early after an amusing walk home, witnessing fashion statements that were more like commands, “Fuck me, Fuck me, Fuck me”, and a parade of luxury cars with intoxicated girls hanging out of sunroofs proclaiming their love for L.A.
Our last day in SoCal was spent in colorful Venice Beach. On our way out of Hollywood, Keely shared her suspicion of the Star Map conspiracy. Her theory is that these hoodlums actually direct you to average people’s homes who are merely dressed as celebrities, hmmmm? Once in Venice we were welcomed with a more familiar atmosphere of the homeless, street performers, sidewalk artists, and tourons. (See Reese’s collection of amalgamated words) We covered the entire strip, popping into the countless t-shirt shops and tattoo shops. Simon tickled my funny bone by pronouncing words much differently than I the Yank would. He ordered his Middle Eastern lunch as a falafel pita with the accent on the first syllable of falafel and short ‘a’s, and a short ‘i’ sound in pita. Soon after Simon’s exquisite artwork purchase and a brief it’s a small world chat about a mutual friend that he and the artist shared from overseas, and we were ever ready to return to Fog City.
Reese’s Top Five from L.A.
5. Simon is completely disgusted by watching someone vomit and day old wet swimming trunks that have been incubating in the sun in the back of the Jeep.
4. Gordy is obsessed with silicon breasts
3. To blend in while in L.A., always have a look on your face as if you’ve just smelled something really foul.
2. There are no grocery stores in L.A.
1. Motel 6 does not offer the following amenities: an iron, an in-room coffee maker, any sort of view, a friendly parking attendant, a pool, an iron, competent reservations staff, complimentary coffee/hot water after 9a.m., mini fridge, microwave, those cute little bottles of hair care and lotion, an iron, continental breakfast, laundry service, shuttle service, porters, a hot tub, room service, or an iron.
> Nothing says 'Yer not from 'round heer' like walking
> into the local T.G.I.Friday's in Newport News, Va and
> having the ENTIRE establishment turn and gawk. A few
> fine citizens were bold enough to actually reach out
> and grope my weave as I walked by. Aside from this
> incident of feeling like the main attraction at the
> county fair freak show, I'm having a great time in lil
> ol VA. My first night here my five year old brother
> and I took a long walk down a country road at dusk ,
> to chase fireflies and listen to the sound of crickets
> and frogs in the woods. My 10 year reunion was
> typical, everyone stuck to their former click, those
> who had plump potential did, and many who didn't did!
> A few alumni took in a bit too much moonshine and
> either revealed a little more than I needed to know
> about a decade of hardships or used the liquid courage
> to express desires that were kept hidden for darn good
> reason. I hung out with the other 2 single folk, my
> friend Wade who I ventured to Europe with when I was
> 14, and my friend Jimmy who I went to my 11th grade
> prom with. Wade is a lifeguard in Nags Head, NC which
> is where I'll be spending the next 3 days with my
> sibs, so he's going to hook us up with neat-o stuff to
> get into. I haven't adjusted to the time difference
> yet nor have I really tried, so I've been up until 3am
> and sleeping until close to noon, spending the early
> part of my day with my friends Tom & Jerry, Scooby-Doo
> and Dexter, PRAISE CARTOON NETWORK!! I took my little
> brother bowling last night, he calls it rollin', he
> hurls the ball down the alley and then assumes one of
> two positions to watch it hit the pins. He either
> lays flat on his stomach to get the eye line view, or
> he turns around and bends over and gets the upside
> down between the knee view.
> I hope all is well on the West side, until next time,
> keeps yer pigs in the pen, and remember Jesus Saves.
> qr
> into the local T.G.I.Friday's in Newport News, Va and
> having the ENTIRE establishment turn and gawk. A few
> fine citizens were bold enough to actually reach out
> and grope my weave as I walked by. Aside from this
> incident of feeling like the main attraction at the
> county fair freak show, I'm having a great time in lil
> ol VA. My first night here my five year old brother
> and I took a long walk down a country road at dusk ,
> to chase fireflies and listen to the sound of crickets
> and frogs in the woods. My 10 year reunion was
> typical, everyone stuck to their former click, those
> who had plump potential did, and many who didn't did!
> A few alumni took in a bit too much moonshine and
> either revealed a little more than I needed to know
> about a decade of hardships or used the liquid courage
> to express desires that were kept hidden for darn good
> reason. I hung out with the other 2 single folk, my
> friend Wade who I ventured to Europe with when I was
> 14, and my friend Jimmy who I went to my 11th grade
> prom with. Wade is a lifeguard in Nags Head, NC which
> is where I'll be spending the next 3 days with my
> sibs, so he's going to hook us up with neat-o stuff to
> get into. I haven't adjusted to the time difference
> yet nor have I really tried, so I've been up until 3am
> and sleeping until close to noon, spending the early
> part of my day with my friends Tom & Jerry, Scooby-Doo
> and Dexter, PRAISE CARTOON NETWORK!! I took my little
> brother bowling last night, he calls it rollin', he
> hurls the ball down the alley and then assumes one of
> two positions to watch it hit the pins. He either
> lays flat on his stomach to get the eye line view, or
> he turns around and bends over and gets the upside
> down between the knee view.
> I hope all is well on the West side, until next time,
> keeps yer pigs in the pen, and remember Jesus Saves.
> qr
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